JASON VOORHEES IS A MEXICAN GANGSTER
SAINT ANDREW'S NET: MEAT BIKINIS!

NCAA PLANNING TO MESS UP BEACH VOLLEYBALL

By / 01.22.09

In April, the NCAA’s Division Legislative Council will likely approve a measure that will integrate beach volleyball into fabric of college sports.  In fact, the only reason that it hasn’t already been added appears to be administrators’ unease with the notion of girls in bikinis.  Mary Buckheit at Page 2 elaborates (emphasis mine):

Would the NCAA really allow a college freshman to hop off the bench, rip off her tear-aways and take to the sands in a bikini — in front of a bleacher full of roommates, boyfriends, girlfriends, grandmothers, protective fathers and mortified mothers?

Kathy DeBoer, executive director of the American Volleyball Coaches Association, laughed as I sheepishly delivered the million-dollar question. “Are you kidding? That question was asked so much so early in this process we literally had to take it off the table… You’re not the only one wondering about this. You say college girls and beach volleyball at a table of administrators and immediately it’s, ‘Umm, what are they going to wear?‘”

Oh, I don’t know… HOW ABOUT BIKINIS???  Jesus Christ, what puritanical colony are these people from?  “Oh my God!  College students!  In bikinis!  Whoever heard of such a thing?!?  How can we allow them to wear the same gear that professionals in the sport wear?  Oh no!  Watch out, it’s a male baring his pectorals!”

Also — and I’m not making this up — the NCAA would change the name of the sport to sand volleyball.  Because beaches are where people have fun, and the NCAA doesn’t want to give you the wrong idea.

Previously in Pussyfooting Around Sexuality in Beach Volleyball: NBC’s Olympic Coverage of Asses


TAGSBEACH VOLLEYBALLNCAA

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