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THANKS, BUT I HAD OTHER PLANS FOR COLLEGE

By / 01.08.09

Every now and again I make fun of the pitifully awkward world of people who play quidditch (see here, here, and here), the made-up game from a children’s book that requires people to pretend to be able to fly on brooms.  Which of course requires them to wear a cape and run around outside holding a broom between their legs.  It appeals to them, I presume, because it requires no hand-eye coordination, and the notion of regular “sports” doesn’t satisfy their need to occupy a fantasy world apart from the harsh reality that scoffs at them and knocks books out of their hands and pushes them down the stairs.

ANYWAY, Dalhousie University, supposedly one of the best colleges in Canadia, is now using its quidditch club as — and I have to switch to all-capitals to make this clear — A REASON TO ATTEND THE COLLEGE.

Oh yes.  Sounds amazing.  Without doing the exact math, I’d guess that there are about a million different ways you could advertise for college.  Exciting, challenging courses.  Ivy on the walls and shit.  Careful use of attractive (but diverse! always racially diverse!) people in the ads.  Nearby outdoor or urban activities.  And so on.  And if you wrote them all out and put them in order from #1 down, I guaranfuckintee you “quidditch club” is number one million.

[Joey deVilla via Food Court Lunch]


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