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FART EARNS YELLOW CARD IN ENGLAND

By / 04.06.09

It was a Sunday pub league game in Manchester where a member of the Chorton Villa side cut ass during a penalty shot that warranted the ire of the referee. The player, unnamed in the report, was assessed a yellow card, and I assume that’s only because referees don’t carry a brown card.

The official deemed the act “ungentlemanly conduct” and booked the player responsible. However Chorlton Villa, who conceded a goal on the second take, went on to win the match 6-4 against local rivals International Manchester FC at Turn Moss in Stretford, Manchester, last Sunday.

Ian Treadwell, manager of Chorlton Villa for the past eight years, said his team had learnt lessons from the game in which three players were dismissed and two were booked.

“They were as shocked as we were as to why. We are waiting for the Football Association to contact us after they have received the report.”

Who would thought gass-passing would have been called offside? Farting should be encouraged, provided it’s either outdoors, in a restroom, or in the face of a woman you pay for sex. Prostitutes aren’t real people, anyway.

|The Guardian, via Unprofessional Foul|


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