TIMBERLAKE, YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD
LEONARD NIMOY ON SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE

RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU DIDN’T SUCK

By / 05.11.09

NBA: There Are No Lakes In LA, Just Cocaine. The Houston Rockets–without Yao Ming–ran the Lakers up and down the floor in their Game 4 yesterday, trouncing the Western Conference favorites, 99-87. It was Houston’s Aaron Brooks (pictured) who led all scorers with 34 points. Kobe was held to 15 points on 7-of-17 shooting. That series is tied, 2-2.

Also, the Celtics tied their series with Orlando after Glen Davis hit a game-winning deuce with time running out . They go back to Boston for Game 5 tomorrow…Denver and Cleveland can advance to their respective conference finals with wins tonight.

NHL: Unoriginal. The Red Wings, Blackhawks, Hurricanes, and Penguins each hold a 3-2 advantage in their series. Chicago and Pittsburgh could wrap up their series with wins tonight. Why Chicago is in the Western Conference, I’ll never understand.

Golf. Tiger didn’t win.

Baseball. Nationals third baseman Ryan Zimmerman has now hit safely in 28 consecutive games. And Reds pitcher Micah Owings hit a home run. I would say that he helped his own cause, but that’s gayer than those pink bats they used yesterday.

This Week In Cocaine. French tennis player Richard Gasquet failed two tests for cocaine and will be suspended. Even worse, Gasquet is French.


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