As the University of Southern California football program has recently received a two-year postseason ban, the forfeiture of three seasons worth of victories, and the loss of 30 scholarships, the focus of what started as a NCAA investigation will now turn to the source – Reggie Bush. Somewhere, a relieved Mike Williams went back to deep-frying his protein bars.
Bush, who reportedly received more than $300,000 in gifts from sports marketing agents during his three years at USC, could now be targeted by the IRS, should the government find that any of the gifts were taxable. When reached for comment, With Leather’s Senior Tax Analyst, Lobster Dog, said: “It is our belief that giant bags full of money are indeed taxable.”
Quit trying to write off Glenn Beck’s doilies, FOX News:
Greenberg estimates that Bush, now the star running back for the New Orleans Saints, “ultimately will wind up paying about $150,000,” but “it could be up to $200,000″ if his financial team can’t get the penalties and interest waived.
The penalties imposed upon the coveted USC football program and former student-athlete Bush are the result of an extensive investigation that discovered the Heisman Trophy winner received more than $300,000 in illegal benefits from marketing agents during the years he played college football.
The former Heisman Trophy winner Bush has stated since the beginning of the NCAA investigation that he is innocent and has openly disagreed with the punishments doled out to USC. He also claims that he’ll cooperate with both the NCAA and USC, should school athletic officials choose to appeal. While IRS representatives cannot legally announce that they’re pursuing Bush for back taxes, it is kind of odd that Tim Geithner bought a new yacht and named it “Bush It to the Limit.”
But you know, I’m sort of dragging my feet today. What do you say, FOX News, you got a lead that’ll give me a little jumpstart?
Good thing Reggie Bush is a fast runner, because the IRS might be chasing him for back taxes…
*bowtie spins, somersaults into kiddie pool filled with mousetraps, sprays Hooters girl’s t-shirt with fake flower*