The Twitter hashtag #WrigleyPickupRules exploded after news of these new ground rules broke, and even though some people are recycling the same five jokes, the entire stream is worth a read. My humble contributions:
Game shall not begin until both Northwestern and Illinois have finished their chores.
Two completions for a first down. And laterals don’t count!
No grabbing Jeremy Ebert’s shirt. His mom just bought him that shirt!
Northwestern “shirts.” Illinois shall be “skins.”
If score is tied after regulation, you can finish your game after supper!
At start of 2nd half, Pat Fitzgerald and Ron Zook will re-pick teams.
At first sign of dusk, next touchdown wins.
Nathan Scheelhaase full-time QB #wrigleypickuprules
Any unsportsmanlike conduct shall be dealt with after telling Mom. #wrigleypickuprules
No balls in the Captain Morgan Club #wrigleypickuprules
Leave your own in the comments. Come on, you guys can do better than this.