Look at Charlie Bell. Doesn’t he look happy? This is the opposite of how he looked when his estranged wife Kenya jumped him in his home and stabbed him with a box cutter. According to Genesee County authorities, the former Miss Michigan assaulted the Golden State Warriors guard (trying to open him without tearing the packaging, I guess) in front of two children and spent a night in jail for her troubles. Thank goodness she didn’t try to break him down and throw him in the bailer.
The 35-year old Kenya Bell faces charges of domestic violence and assault with a dangerous weapon, which seems kind of light, as I spent about a year working at Office Max and almost accidentally ended my life with a box cutter on about 45 different occasions. She’s also our second use of the Women Be Stabbing tag in nine days, which is weird, because we’re a sports blog and not the Faces of Death website.
This is the worst thing to happen to the Warriors since Tim Hardaway opened his mouth and ruined like 15 years of me liking him.