Carlos Beltran To The Giants - Hopefully by “Giants” they mean “Cleveland Indians”. Jason Fry (as always) said it best, via his Twitter: “Watching Beltran’s final #Mets AB. Hope #sfgiants fans appreciate him more than WFAN morons did. Those of us with a clue will miss him”. [Yardbarker]
Camp Ryan is Back in Business - It’s sort of like a Dugout, but about football and they get to curse as much as they want. Okay, so it’s not really about football. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
Submission Namesakes: Five Fighters And The Holds That Bear Their Name - Is the LeBell Lock on this list? What about the Scorpion Deathlock? Urgh, I need to learn more about MMA. [Cage Potato]
If Brett Favre Doesn’t Return, The NFL Shouldn’t Bother To Come Back At All - The best thing about Brett Favre since Michael Vick thought “Brett Farve” should come to Philadelphia and be his back-up. I’ll take it one step further — if Dan Marino doesn’t come out of retirement and give me a football player to like, the NFL should fold completely. [SBN]
Poor Little Guys: The Seattle Mariners Losing Streak As Told By Sad Dogs - I’d like to think we single-handedly willed them back into baseball existence. If you haven’t check this out since yesterday, we added an extra dog to reflect Wednesday’s game. [With Leather]
The Dugout by Charles Bukowski - The second in our Celebrity Guest Writers series tackles the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, and was written before they no-hit the Indians. Today’s Dugout is just a picture of me scowling with the words F**K YOU ANGELS underneath in scrolling letters. [The Dugout]
The Best and Worst of Raw 7/25 - It’s Thursday and the comments are still surging, discussing whether CM Punk’s return to the show was “rushed” or just part of the plan. Be sure to check out the comments to these things, because (at least right now) it’s the most sane, peaceful collection of wrestling fans ever. And so many of them think John Cena is gay, I don’t know. [With Leather]
Pine Tree Loses Its Nuts - Want to watch a bear convince a kid he should be a bad sport and kick a tree in the balls? Of course you do. Watch this video. [With Leather]
The Whitest White People Movie In History - New Year’s Eve is the sequel (basically) to Valentine’s Day and features your 60 least favorite white actors and Ludacris. Ludacris is the new Ice Cube, and should give up rapping and just be the wacky uncle on somebody’s terrible sitcom. Can’t turn a ho into a housewife! Hoes don’t act right! [Film Drunk]
Funny, Sexy and Awesome Cosplay Of The Week - I legitimately don’t care about cosplaying women, I’m sharing this because of the people that dressed up like Ice Climbers. Extra points if they have a polar bear wearing sunglasses. [Gamma Squad]
Jon Stewart Turns on President Obama - And I’m not just linking this because he mentions our WONDERFUL FREE FANTASY BASEBALL WITH DRAFTSTREET in the first paragraph. At this point Obama needs to just say “welp” and turn over the country to literally anyone else. You seem like a nice guy, but sh** or get off the pot for God’s sake. [UPROXX]
Summers Eve “Hail To The V” - I don’t want to type “smdh” every day, but I am shaking my damn head so hard at how even our douche commercials have to be irreverent. They’re DOUCHE COMMERCIALS. Not everything has to be the f**king Old Spice Guy. [Smoking Section]
I want more like this!
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