State Of Nate (Robinson): Episode 1
Artist who injects self with horse blood shockingly not James Franco

The Professional Wrestling Divas Guide To Fantasy Football Tight Ends

By 08.10.11

The Tammy Lynn Sytches

Wrestling used to have lower standards. I always have.

Years ago when I was a handsome but brash college sophomore, some friends and I took a trip to Kissimmee to check out the ECW in its early days. After the show, which included me throwing a bicycle pump into the ring for Sandman, we sat next to Sunny and Chris Candido at a Waffle House. She seemed pretty cool. I guess if there’s a point here, it’s that we probably remember her as being more attractive than she was, so we still carry a torch. Like these guys as late round picks. I know, it doesn’t make sense. It doesn’t have to.

18) Heath Miller – He’s apparently going to be mixing it up as a wide receiver this season. I have no clue what that means other than he’s not a dependable TE.

19) Marcedes Lewis – The Jags’ offense is a mess, otherwise I would probably have him higher. But even if Garrard was healthy, I still wouldn’t draft him.

20) Greg Olsen – He was ousted from Mike Martz’s “I hate Tight Ends” offense and landed in Carolina’s TE-happy schemes. Could be an interesting development. It also could be a surefire way to get 0 points each week. Either way, it’s giving me great material for NotJayCutler this season.

21) Anthony Fasano – I really wanted the Dolphins to get Zach Miller, since “Check Down” Chad Henne loves throwing to the Plan B receivers. Fasano gets some looks but I don’t really want any Dolphin not named Brandon Marshall in my starting lineup. And even then…

22) Aaron Hernandez – I said earlier that I prefer Gronk, but Hernandez will get his touches, too. The Pats love mixing their TE’s in, but they’re both going to be inconsistent in fantasy scoring.

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