My buddy texted me this morning to ask what Game 6 looked like through the eyes of a St. Louis Cardinals fan last night, and it took me about 3 hours to respond. I’ve never seen anything so remarkable, so bipolar, so… baseball, in all my life. One second I’m on a stool, rope wrapped tightly around my neck, just waiting for Matt Holliday to kick the legs out. The next I’m screaming for Jon Jay to haul his unkempt afro to home plate. It was way too stressful for a guy with a long family history of high blood pressure, but it was amazing nonetheless.
There are three types of sports fans – the kind that love baseball (like Brandon and I do), the kind that don’t have a problem with baseball but don’t love it enough to watch a game that they don’t have a horse in, and the kind that think baseball sucks. That third kind usually still owns a New York Yankees hat. I don’t think there’s a way in this world that anyone didn’t think last night’s Game 6 between the Cardinals and the Texas Rangers wasn’t the most incredible game they’ve ever witnessed. And we thought it couldn’t get better than the last game of the regular season.
The Cardinals won 10-9 in the bottom of the 11th on a walk-off blast by David Freese to dead center. This game featured boneheaded errors, 28 hits in total, and more World Series firsts than I can even list right now. So let’s recap the game in pictures, or at least the parts I can remember.
I’m only mentioning R&B singer Joe because every time I hear his name I think of Hot to Trot when the announcer says, “And bringing up the rear, it’s… Don.”
“Holliday’s hitting 0-for-18 in this series? Someone get my old ass a bat!”
GRRRRRRRRRRRR GRITTIEST CEREMONIAL FIRST PITCH EVER!
Right about this point, I ordered my second shot of the night. I knew it was going to be one of those games.
You have to have faith in your pitcher when his beard is that neatly trimmed.
Are Yankees fans even slightly pissed that Lance Berkman was going to retire after his terrible season last year and now he’s a MVP candidate socking 2-run bombs in the World Series? I’d ask about the well-being of Astros fans but they’ve suffered enough.
“Damn it! I’m never gonna figure this batting thing out.”
“Haha, hey guys look at me! Look at what I can do!”
“Come here, you adorable little pinata!”
Joe Buck: “Tim, you have to respect the kind of errors that a guy like Michael Young can make. They’re just the classiest errors that only a true leader can offer his team.”
“So, does it go like this then?”
“I’m just gonna go ahead and guarantee my MVP trophy now…”
Fact: Narcolepsy affects more than 30% of Major League third basemen each year.
“I am very disappointed in your selection of balls and strikes.”
“And she said, ‘Just try it once and see if you like it’ and now I can’t get enough of the sh*t.”
Made me instantly think of this…
“Wait, which one of us is pitching?”
“Now you do the same thing, but hit the ever loving tits off of it!”
“I do good, Mikey?”
“Excuse me, but I mustache to home plate!”
“I AM CONTRIBUTING!”
“Get me Rzcep… Zrep… Czrep… Dotel.”
Joe Buck: “Could this be Albert Pujols’ last 9th inning double in a St. Louis Cardinals uniform?”
“Yes, yes, yes…”
“No, no, no…”
LOL O RLY?
“So inside fastball to Josh Hamilton… that’s a bad idea.”
“All right, NOW it’s over!”
Aw, poor Nyjer Morgan.