“Suck For Luck” Power Rankings: Week 7

By: 10.25.11  •  7 Comments

That light is Mike Brown's smile.

16) Oakland Raiders (4-3) – Did anyone on this planet with at least an elementary level of football knowledge think that playing Carson Palmer at any point of this weekend’s game was a good idea? Two weeks ago, he was tailgating at a USC game, drinking beer and hitting on coeds. He’s not Rob Gronkowski, damn it.

17) New York Jets (4-3) – After another week of telling us how many rings he could or should have, Rex Ryan somehow got his team to come from behind to beat the San Diego Chargers. Now Rex says that this team is going to win a lot more games. That’s good, seeing as he has to win the Super Bowl twice this year to make up for last year’s promise.

18) Baltimore Ravens (4-2) – The Ravens deserve so much more scorn than this. I wanted to completely leave them off the list after last night. That game was phenomenally bad. Ray Lewis should invite Cam Cameron out to a night club.

19) Houston Texans (4-3) – The Texans had a huge statement win over the Titans this week, so now here’s what they need to do – not turn around and suck again next week. Tennessee has no business being in the playoff picture with Chris Johnson playing like Larry Johnson and Kenny Britt out. Time for consistency, Houston.

20) Atlanta Falcons (4-3) – The Falcons are accusing Ndamukong Suh of mocking Matt Ryan when he was down on the field with an injury on Sunday, while Roddy White called out Cliff Avril for kicking Ryan’s feet and yelling, “Get him off the field.” I remember a time when NFL players got revenge by winning and going after the opposing team’s QB. Not winning and whining.

21) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-3) – I still can’t believe the NFL sent the Bucs to London. And yet somehow London wants its own full time team. What a peculiar place.

22) Chicago Bears (4-3) – Matt Forte has 1,000 yards through Week 7. Memo to Matt: When you hold out next year for more money, remember to work out so you’re good when you come back, too.

23) Cincinnati Bengals (4-2) – I like to imagine Bengals owner Mike Brown cackling with delight as Carson Palmer threw his THREE interceptions on Sunday, and then mocking him by throwing trash at Jordan Palmer. What a strangely humorous situation this turned into.

24) San Diego Chargers (4-2) – Of all the games to blow, the Chargers had to blow it against the Jets. After a week of listening to Rex Ryan insult Norv Turner over and over. Oh well, good thing Norv is the kind of guy who can bounce back and win with confidence.

25) Buffalo Bills (4-2) – Nothing like a nice week off for everyone to get healthy and regain focus for the Bills to come back and turn into the Bills again.

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