6) Jacksonville Jaguars (3-6) – The Jags deserve complete blame for the Colts just waltzing to 0-16. Jacksonville was the only franchise sorry enough to lose to Indy and they’ve blown it. Sure, they can win the next one, but it won’t matter by then. Bunch of jerks.
7) Cleveland Browns (3-6) – Make no mistake, Cleveland is the worst team in the NFL right now.
8) Seattle Seahawks (3-6) – I’ve left Marshawn Lynch on my bench in two fantasy leagues for the last two weeks as he’s finally reached Beast Mode. I will start him this week against the Rams. So what do you think? MCL? ACL? Gotta be something like that.
9) Arizona Cardinals (3-6) – Ken Whisenhunt says that he won’t listen to any comments about a QB controversy now that John Skelton is playing well while Kevin Kolb is out with turf toe. You know why there’s no controversy? Because the Cardinals knew that Skelton was good enough last season and they still traded away their best defensive player for Kolb.
10) Washington Redskins (3-6) – Chad Henne wants to stay with the Dolphins next season, so that might put a damper on Mike Shanahan’s plan to collect the most incompetent lineup of QBs in NFL history. Baby steps, though. He has to sign David Carr and Joey Harrington first.
11) Philadelphia Eagles (3-6) – At least the “everyone is injured” excuse is finally an option. Also, DeSean Jackson owing Drew Rosenhaus a ton of money for using his credit card may be my favorite story of the season thus far. Has an agent ever kneecapped a client? Let’s wait and see!
12) Kansas City Chiefs (4-5) – The NFC West is entertaining in a “let’s go push a bum into traffic” kind of way. That said, and with Matt Cassel possibly done for the season, the Chiefs are that bum.
13) Denver Broncos (4-5) – Tim Tebow is 3-1 since becoming the Broncos’ QB, so I’m not going to point out that two of those wins are against pathetic Miami and Kansas City teams. Instead, I will predict he only wins 2 more games this season.
14) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-5) – The Bucs have lost three in a row since upsetting New Orleans in Week 6, and I can’t watch a second of it in Orlando because nobody is going to their games. I am thankful for this.
15) San Diego Chargers (4-5) – On one hand, Philip Rivers could just be in a funk and snap back into his status as one of the best QBs in the NFL at any moment and right the ship. On the other hand, Norv Turner’s going to get a lot of rest after this season.