Move Over, Teen Choice Awards!

If you’ve ever thought that the ESPY’s are great in theory, but you just can’t handle all those meaningless sports honors at one time, then the NFL has some news that will make your day much better. Instead of simply announcing the season awards, the NFL is going the award show route and will present the league’s MVP, Coach of the Year, Rookie of the Year and other various honors at a ceremony on the Saturday night before the Super Bowl.

In a blog post written earlier today at another location, I dismissively wanked.

All seven AP NFL awards will be presented from 9-11 p.m. EST live from the Murat Theater in Indianapolis during a show hosted by “30 Rock” star Alec Baldwin. The show will feature a live performance by Lenny Kravitz and appearances by Hall of Famers Jerry Rice, Barry Sanders, Deion Sanders, Shannon Sharpe and Steve Young.

The awards program will be preceded by a red carpet show on NFL Network from 8-9 p.m. EST.

(Via the Arizona Star)

This isn’t a completely terrible idea, because Alec Baldwin is awesome and I’ll watch anything that he’s involved with. But this is what also drives me nuts about the NFL. The Saturday night before the Super Bowl is probably a good of a time as any to present these awards, but a red carpet event in Indianapolis in February? I’m sure the players are going to love that.

Instead, how about we move the Pro Bowl back to after the Super Bowl, since nobody really cares about that glorified flag football match anyway, and hold this little shindig that weekend so these guys can enjoy a lazy vacation in Hawaii and we can surround them with jiggling cheerleaders in coconut bras? I’m not the smartest guy in the world, but I know a good opportunity when I see one.

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