The New York Giants And Kate Upton Won Super Bowl XLVI

By defeating the New England Patriots 21-17 last night in Indianapolis, the New York Giants are the Super Bowl XLVI Champions. *holds for applause* Chances are you watched the game and know that it started off boring, then got really exciting, had some old lady flopping around and later ended with Giants quarterback Eli Manning leading what has become his trademark in a 4th quarter comeback. Manning earned his second Super Bowl MVP and he should headline an offseason of stories not limited to but including:

  • Is Eli better than his brother Peyton Manning now? And many lazy people will say yes because he has two Super Bowl rings.
  • Is the era of Bill Belichick, Tom Brady and the Patriots over? And the answer is no, because Tom Brady is still a badass.
  • Has Gisele Bundchen’s god forsaken her? Probably.
  • Where is Peyton going to play? Will he end up in Miami? Washington? With the New York Jets? The Toronto Argonauts? And the answer is Miami. It has to happen. I sacrificed way too many virgins to the gods this weekend.

And there will be other news and notes, but they’ll all irresponsibly gloss over the fact that on Saturday, Kate Upton, Chrissy Teigen, Erin Andrews and some other people who claim to be famous played in the sixth annual Celebrity Beach Bowl, and while nobody tried desperately to tear Upton’s shorts off like Tom Arnold did with Marisa Miller last year, she still managed to steal our hearts once again.
Also, Brooklyn Decker was at the GQ/Lacoste Super Bowl party with some guy who plays ping pong or something, so I included them so they don’t feel left out and cry. I’m a sweetheart.

(Images via Getty.)
The fact that Artie Lange was more athletic than me this weekend is depressing.
I don’t know very much about Chase Crawford, but I don’t like him.
Having cheerleaders at an event with Kate Upton is like visual gluttony.
I loved Chris Meloni in Wet Hot American Summer, but he seems like a strange man.
I don’t know who Christina McLarty is or what she does, but I am a huge fan.
Of course David Arquette was on the prowl, taking a break from not acting.
Gee, a football huddle with Deion Sanders and Merril Hoge calling the plays? YES PLEASE!
Katy Perry didn’t play in the the Beach Bowl, but she did present at the NFL Honors on Saturday night, and of course she made a joke to Tim Tebow, telling him that her parents say, “Hi.” Nobody laughed.
Maria Menounos is adorable.
Oh good, Arquette is getting his stink all over Nina Dobrev and Hope Solo, too.
“Quick, send scouts to check out Terrell Owens at the Beach Bowl game!” – Not a single NFL GM.
$20 says Joe tried to pull a Namath.
Can you two get a little closer, my lens is small.
This guy is in the band The Fray, which performed songs from their new album, “Music to Shave Your Chest To.”
Okay, down to business.

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