Best: Tyson Kidd On Raw, or
Worst: Tyson Kidd Getting Like 12 Seconds On Raw
Remember the “emotional roller-coaster” list I made for the Alberto Del Rio/Sin Cara match? Here’s the one I had for Tyson Kidd/Tensai.
1. Hey, Tyson Kidd’s on Raw!
2. the f**k
Tyson Kidd pins
Lord Tensai with a roll-up a la Kelly Kelly in Kelly Kelly time, then we launch into another “Tensai beats up his assistant” segment that lasts longer than the match. Lawler saying “this is more embarrassing for Tensai than anything” was weirdly accurate.
THEN we jump backstage to the hilarious nobodies locker room we never see on Raw (Tyson could’ve at least had a pair of casual jorts hanging up in the background like Cena) for a sideline interview (“we just went out there and played our game”) and a Lord Tensai attack. Guys have to be tough and scary for these attacks to work. You made sure Tensai was not tough or scary. You didn’t even have him Mountain Dew hand the guy, he just tossed him into some lockers.
Worst: I Am Spacing Out During These Tag Matches
Again with the tag matches, Teddy, Jesus Christ. I’m surprised Tyson Kidd and Justin Gabriel didn’t face Tensai and a Mr. Yunioshi’d out Karl Anderson.
The video above starts with that weird moment where John Cena decides to beat up Chris Jericho all the way to the back, despite Jericho not really asking for it or needing it. Cena just starts walking and punching him in a specific direction like he’s trying to roll a Katamari. Punk and Bryan is as good as Punk can be, but I get the feeling we should just let them wrestle each other at special times, and not burn through all the exchanges they can do.
Best: And Here We … Go
For the first time in a long time, the ending to Raw was great.
It’s our first official confirmation that AJ doesn’t give a crap about these guys anymore and is just trying to make their lives miserable. She pretends like she’s going to commit wrestling suicide (jumping off the top rope through a table, the most deadly thing you could do to yourself) (you need assistance to get a chokeslam to Hell, which is the worst overall) to get them involved, then more or less pisses in their faces and taunts over their dead bodies.
That’s somebody I want to cheer. All we need is for her storyline with the boys to be over at Money In The Bank, no matter what happens, and an equally fully-realized female babyface to show up, siphon her cheers and give us our first chance to really care the way we should about women wrestling in the big leagues in years and years.
Best: The 3-Hour Raw Commercial Is The Best Thing About 3-Hour Raws
The best part is Kane’s “bayke a cayyyyke”, followed closely by the image of The Great Khali checking your prostate by slapping you in the head and dancing.
Best: Top 10 Comments Of The Week
I can picture office Kane saying “Why should I change my name, Charles Foster is the one who sucks.”
“Did you know, tweeting used to be what birds did”
Philo Beddoe, re: Tensai/Kidd
That was the worst bear-twink porn ever.
Regal should win the Battle Royal tomorrow. Just to get him back as the GM
Just one year ago, CM Punk was f**king John Cena’s shit up. And now, they are tag team partners. This time next year, Sakamoto and Tensai will be tag champions.
Tyson 1-2-3 Kidd
why does nobody just go for nothing but groin shots in a no dq match? it’s the smart move.
My grandfather wore the same singlet as Big Show when he fought in Korea.
Tobogganing Bear gets two this week.
The way the WWE is promoting No Holds Barred is kind of like Larry The Cable Guy gesturing at an old Gallagher VHS tape and saying “can you believe we used to laugh at this bullshit?”
Punk’s “I don’t know” gesture totally just gave me a flashback to the original WWE Smackdown video game from when Michael Cole would do it after every interview.
See you guys next week. And don’t forget, if you’re bored tonight (or love me and want to support my website) stop by the WWE Smackdown GREAT AMERICAN BASH~ open discussion thread. The link doesn’t work right now, but it will in like an hour.