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The Political Victory Nobody Is Talking About: Kate Upton’s Uncle Won His Election

By / 11.07.12

From here on out, I will photoshop Kate Upton over every politician's picture.


I don’t know anything about Michigan’s Fred Upton and his politics, but for circumstances that are important to the very fabric with which this site operates, I had to look them up. Turns out Upton is a Republican Congressman (don’t care) from Michigan’s 6th district (dooooon’t care) and he is also the Chairman of the Committee on Energy and Commerce (double dog doodie don’t care). However, he’s also the uncle of 2011 With Leather Celebrity Sports Fan of the Year Kate Upton and we absolutely care about that.

According to Michigan Live, this year’s election was a big kick in the pants for the incumbent congressman. Sure, he’s been in office since 1987 (originally in the 4th district, now in the 6th), but his margin of victory in this election was closer than it has ever been.

In 2008, Upton won Kalamazoo County with 53 percent of the vote, or by 12,429 votes. Tuesday night, Upton won 2012 by 9 votes. Looking at the presidential results, Obama received 56.1 percent of the county vote, compared to 58.9 percent in 2008.

In 2010, Upton won the county with 57 percent of the vote.

But Fred’s a smart dude, and he knew that he had to bring in the big guns to remind everyone just how powerful he really is.

That’s Kate with some of Fred’s supporters. There hasn’t been any word yet as to whether or not Detroit Tigers pitcher and Kate’s alleged boyfriend Justin Verlander was there or not, but I’m going to report, with 0% of the polls giving a crap, that he wasn’t because she dumped him for not winning the World Series. In fact, I picture her slapping him multiple times and spitting on his hat before riding away on her unicorn named Heaven.

And since this was all nonsensical and we’ve all had enough of politics, here’s a picture from Kate’s latest Vogue shoot.


TOPICS#KATE UPTON
TAGSCONGRESSEXCUSES TO POST PICTURES OF HOT CHICKSKEEP YOUR POLITICS OUT OF MY SPORTSMICHIGANTOTALLY NOT SPORTS RELATED

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