With the NHL entering the 68th day of the lockout, teams are probably more desperate than ever to earn a little coin on the side, and it might seem like the Toronto Maple leafs reached that tipping point back in October. At a recent auction, 112 random items from the Maple Leaf Gardens were sold to the highest bidders, and sure, you can say that all sports franchises auction off stuff like chairs and banners and whatnot, but it’s fun to pretend like an NHL team is desperate and broke.
But in fairness, this auction actually occurred because a private collector named Sherman Cunningham decided it was time to get rid of all of his Leafs clutter that included an original, one-of-a-kind 1967 Stanley Cup banner. Oh, and he also had a toilet from the locker room, because you wouldn’t want a locker room toilet?
Cunningham paid $3,600 for the toilet 12 years ago, so how much did this porcelain poop container mature over the years? It sold for $5,300 to 55-year old lawyer Jim Vigmond. What the hell do you do with a $5,300 toilet anyway?
Well, that depends on who wins: my wife Sharon or I. Sharon suggested that it be buried in the backyard. But I’ve got a better place for it. I’ve got sort of a combination cigar-smoking/sport- memorabilia room. I might put it in there with The Gardens’ washroom directional sign [another prize up for auction]. I’ve got to make certain that some of my drunken friends that come in there know that it’s not hooked up to plumbing. (Via The Grid)
Before you cast pucks, just how big of a Leafs fan is Vigmond? (You know, aside from spending 5 stacks on a crapper.)
I had set a limit of $5,000, but it was a soft limit. My son’s an ardent Leafs fan; he and I really bleed blue-and-white. My son has the Maple Leafs logo tattooed on his back. He said to me, “Dad, just think of all the stories on that toilet.”
Well, the Leafs didn’t call George Armstrong “Ol’ Blumpkin” because he was good at hockey, that’s for sure. And I’ll just assume that this is Vigmond’s son:
I want more like this!
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