Best: Yes, I am actually giving this whole thing a Best, don’t look at me like that
Okay, so it may have started out kind of crummy, and THIS BUSINESS makes me roll my eyes until they hurt, but this is the soapiest, most ridiculous segment and I am ALL OVER IT. I dare you not to giggle at Hulk Hogans Immobilized Poopies Face of Disapproval. Bully Ray is stretching himself beyond “Guy Who Shouts Stuff” to legitimate emotional depth for all of this, not to mention that he can tell Brooke Hogan that he loves her more than his storied career in professional wrestling and keep a straight face. That’s talent, guys.
Maybe the best part of this segment is Sting. I wish this would have been interrupted by a Sting internal monologue, because man is he ever uncomfortable witnessing all of this. There is literally no point in him being there, and it’s fantastic.
There are so many places they could go with this, and I can’t believe I am looking forward to seeing what’s going to happen. Is Bully Ray going to turn on all of them because he’s been working with his brother all along and the entire thing is a set up for him to turn heel again? Will Devon show up at the wedding to be Bully’s Best Man, despite the fact that he just threatened to mangle Brooke’s face, because Brotherly Love? Will Spike Dudley show up in a tie-dyed tuxedo and make the happiest girl in the world? Okay yeah, probably not that last one. Either way, once you get past the execution, the pathos of Hulk Hogan is something incredibly easy to become invested in, and may unknowingly be one of the most interesting things in wrestling right now.
Even better best: Bully Ray is thrilled to be engaged
These two are going to have the best wedding photos EVER.