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The Best And Worst Of Impact Wrestling 3/13/13: Everyone Knows It’s Windy

By / 03.18.13

Best: AJ Styles, Young Lions Cup Champion

Apparently the only way to ever, ever make me interested in what’s going to happen with AJ Styles is to have him do his best Tim Donst impression. Had he shouted “WHY’D YOU MAKE ME DO THAT” after clotheslining James Storm, I would have immediately….well, I wouldn’t have spent any money, but I would have definitely thought long and hard about my past indifferences towards AJ Styles while re-watching night 1 of Chikara’s King of Trios 2012.

Worst: My DVR glitched and cut out almost the entire Joe Park segment

So I’m just going to pretend that Matt Morgan showed up, complimented Joseph Park on his progress as a wrestler, congratulated him on the Ws under his belt, told him his tie was nice and then LEFT FOREVER.

Best: ER’BODY GETTING’ PUNCHED UP IN HERE

Hogan comes out to address Aces & Eights, and says that he’s empowered everyone remaining on the roster to go after Aces & Eights. Technically, this full-roster type of melee should be reserved for the end of a show prior to the Royal Rumble, and if it goes on for too long it’s ridiculous. And this was…long. There are two takeaways from this, though:

1. My heart! I love all-out brawls/battle royals/Royal Rumbles. My favourite thing about them is when a wrestler will get totally lost, and just kind of wander around, looking for someone to punch, or try to get in on something two other people already have going on. Mr. Perfect did this a lot. In fact, one could say he did it perfectly. I love the early Royal Rumbles when guys would still try to find ways to be involved, as opposed to laying along the ropes for almost the entire thing (2006 Rey Mysterio and Triple H, I mean you), because it ends up looking so silly. And this fight is just full of silliness Look at Mike Knox wander! Joseph Park, look at your punches! lol, Chavo! Oh, it’s all so wonderful.

2. Aces & Eights completely run roughshod over the roster/ Bully Ray points out to “Dad,” as he stands tall over the broken and bent bodies of everyone who ran out, that they’ve won. Hulk’s “cavalry” has been defeated, and laughable at best. Aces & Eights look tough and unstoppable, as opposed to getting scared off by a group of guys half of what they have, and I’m really looking forward to next week.


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