Tonight, on the “go home” edition of the pre-WrestleMania WWE Raw open discussion thread:
It’s almost here. The biggest event in all of WWE and the moment millions of WWE Universe members have been waiting for. With emotions and adrenaline at an all-time high, what will unfold when Superstars come face to face one last time before WrestleMania? Here are five reasons this week’s Raw is must-see at 8/7 CT on USA Network. (via WWE.com)
Our five-point preview:
1. It’s April Fool’s Day and John Cena has a live microphone, so expect something hilarious. Suggested dialogue: “I’ve decided to back out of my match with the Rock. I’m scared, and I don’t think I can win. He’s just too good. I’ve also decided to start wearing pink dresses and Harlem Shaking the Octomom on the mouth. JUST KIDDING APRIL FOOL’S I’M GOIN’ TO RASSLEMANIA” etc.
2. WWE is advertising an all-star show tonight, with Triple H, The Rock, Chris Jericho, Brock Lesnar and the Undertaker all appearing. So, you know, it’s a normal Raw from 2002.
3. It’s the last show before WrestleMania, which means 2.5 of the 3 hours will be recap video packages, and the other .5 will be the quickest, safest matches possible to keep everybody healthy and uninjured. So, you know, if Brodus Clay wrestles Cody Rhodes tonight and beats him in 45 seconds with a shove and a splash, don’t get too upset about it.
4. WWE’s five-point preview is hilarious, because they have nothing to say. It’s like “CM Punk and the Undertaker are having a match at WrestleMania. Will tensions flare?” and then the next slide and is just “Jack Swagger challenges Alberto Del Rio at WrestleMania. Will they get mad at each other tonight?”
5. the shield has a match with some guys will those guys get fighty about it please tune into raw for more details
As always, my 10 favorite comments from tonight’s WWE Raw open discussion thread will be featured in tomorrow’s Best and Worst of WWE Raw report. Be sure to nominate comments for top 10 consideration by replying to them with a +1. Extra +1s are earned for constructive, literate commentary, so tell me what you think should/will happen on Raw sometimes instead of just telling me who Jerry Lawler wants to have sex with. -1s earned for reading that sentence and immediately going into the comments to post a Jerry Lawler joke.
Enjoy the show, everybody.