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Manchester United’s Patrice Evra Fell Into The Stands And Got His Butthole Groped

By / 12.03.13

Pictured: the scene of the crime<br />(via Getty Image)


Reminder to any ladies attending a live soccer match: soccer games are not your friend’s bachelorette party. Keep your hands to yourself.

Manchester United player Patrice Evra fell into a home end full of Tottenham fans on Sunday and ended up either getting his butt pinched or getting a full-on balls scoop, depending on your point of view. Because it’s a weird invasive lady doing it to a 32-year old man and not, say, a guy groping Alex Morgan, nothing really happened. I want to launch into a big “sexual harassment is sexual harassment so cut it out” speech, but Tottenham supporters are the same ones who threw a lit flare at a referee, so maybe Patrice got off easy.

Here’s the clip:

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Her “immediately turn around and laugh about how crazy I am to my friends” reaction is the worst part. I’m genuinely surprised that she wasn’t Instagramming her own sexual assault.

The full story is the GIF, courtesy of the appropriately-named Balls.ie, which gives you Patrice’s reaction to the spelunking.

evra

Yeah, seems about right.

Again, keep your hands (and feet, and flares and fire and weapons) to yourselves, soccer fans.


TAGSMANCHESTER UNITEDPATRICE EVRAREASONS TO HATE SOCCERsexual harrassmentSOCCERSOCCER FANS ARE INSANETOTTENHAM HOTSPUR

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