The Best And Worst of Impact Wrestling 3/13/14: No, I Mean The One In The Old West

By: 03.14.14


Best: Mending fences

It’s so nice to see that Taeler Hendrix is still able to get work.

Sort of Best: Angelina Love….kinda? Not particularly, no.

Hoo boy this was rough. I only give this a best because I’ve had three separate conversations with three different people about how quasi-offensive but majorly entertaining the Winter/Angelina Love vs. the Knockouts roster not under a weird sexy vampire spell angle was. Realistically it wasn’t fantastic, but even I have to admit that it’s one of those things I look back on with fondness. Angelina Love didn’t have to speak and could just DDT the crud out of people, Winter had no core strength but didn’t have to really wrestle, just mostly be pale and pretty and German. It was also a defined Knockouts storyline that got multiple segments and matches of import.

Going forwards, I have all the faith in the world that this will be nothing like that in any way.

Worst: Oh. Oh no.

I…I think I just figured out what is happening. Bobby Lashley, MVP, a seeming reunion of the Beautiful People, rumours (extremely plausible rumours) that Vince Russo is showrunning from behind the curtain…we’re in a time travel episode. We hit 88mph and we’re all back in 2009. Jeff Jarrett is doing his own thing, Kevin Nash is back with WWE, Kurt Angle will be as soon as he gets his Robocop suit, and this is what we’re left with.

Did the room just get super tiny and full of clutching chest pains for anyone else?

It Definitely Happened: Willow vs. Rockstar Spud

what is even happening

The wacky screen effect. His velvet pants. His literally showing up out of nowhere to shout about death and cackle a bunch. This is one of those things you watch wide-eyed in amazement because it’s impossibly ridiculous, and can’t be real, but it’s on TV and I haven’t done a million drugs so it has to be happening, right?

You see it too, right?


Actual Best: What Willow inspires

And I don’t mean the sudden idea that spinning an umbrella around indoors is a safe idea. (It’s not. Teach your children well, and let them see that umbrellas are for outdoors and to stay away from people who have done a million drugs). I mean my super cool dude friend Kyle Starks has made these wonderful Willow comics, and the world should be enjoying them.

Worst: Boo this man! Or…I guess…don’t…

Reminder: the good guy is the one who very recently wanted to murder Mr. Anderson’s wife and set his newborn twins on fire.

TNA, everybody!

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