Worst: Daniel Bryan, Lifelong Hulkamaniac
Okay, sure — Hulk Hogan is totally jazzed brother about Daniel Bryan being World Champion. If he had even a fraction of the power he had in the 80s and 90s he wouldn’t use ever molecule of it to make sure a guy like Bryan never came within a 100 feet of a world title. Right.
And yeah, Daniel Bryan is just the world’s biggest Hulkamaniac. You can tell from all those backrakes and big boots he incorporates into his matches. Shawn who? Kawada-what? William Regal? That jobber? Nope, Hulk Hogan is clearly his biggest inspiration.
Man, it’s not easy being the most insincere segment on a show with John Cena shouting in his southern accent about how excited he is about Bo Dallas and Cesaro, but this one pulled it off. I guess that’s the price of being a top guy in WWE — sometimes you have to pretend to love a thing you could care less about, but WWE thinks is important. And by “sometimes” I mean “every time, all the time”.
Anyways, after the Hogan/Bryan lovefest, Bryan did Hulk’s poses with him while JBL and Cole snickered and verbally eyerolled. Guys, remember how you devoted an entire Wrestlemania to Daniel Bryan? You can’t put the confetti back in the rafters and go back to “Daniel Bryan is a nerd” jokes now.
Best: I’m The One Guy
Show of hands, does anyone else enjoy Wade Barrett in the ring, but find the whole Bad News Barrett shtick consistently unfunny and stupid? No? Just me then?
I’m so glad Barrett is wrestling again. I think the guy’s hugely underrated in the ring — he’s got a great swagger and physicality when WWE isn’t beating the life out of him. I even like his stupid elbow. Before he hits it a big red weak spot appears on him like a Zelda boss exposing it’s final form! How can you not love that? I’ll take another thousand elbows over another serving of d-grade comedy writing from WWE’s failed sitcom writers. Also his new cape looks like he just pulled his grandmother’s curtains down and threw them over his back. Screw the stupid podium, curtains cape forever.