Best: So That Means Big Dave’s Joining The Shield, Right?
It would’ve been so awesome if Batista had jogged back in all out of breath like HEY GUYS I’M BACK SHIT WAIT WHAT ARE WE DOING. I think everybody’s gonna make the “Batista’s joining The Shield” joke, but wouldn’t it be the best thing that ever happened? Dave coming down to the ring in skinny jeans, sunglasses and a bright blue vest. Never knowing when to wear the dog mask. I’d love it.
I’m taking a Wait And See Where It Goes™ here. My initial reaction is “BLARGH THIS DOESN’T MAKE SENSE” followed by a complicated understanding of WWE swerving for the sake of a swerve, and comfort in the idea that we’ll never have to wonder when they’re breaking up the Shield again. That’s a big part of it. You know how many times I’ve had to write about when the Shield’s gonna break up, and where the guys are gonna go from there, and how we should repackage everybody? Now we get to actually do it. That’s fun, isn’t it?
In reality, it can make a bunch of different kinds of sense. Don’t forget, they’re good guys now, but The Shield was on Triple H’s side for like 80% of their WWE run. It’s not really “selling out” for a guy who was on the ATTACK PEOPLE FOR MONEY mercenary team deciding to throw back in with the guy with all the power and money, is it? From his perspective, Reigns and Ambrose suddenly growing consciences could be hurting his career, especially since he’s the “architect” who has had to keep them together this whole time. Rollins is the one we know the least about, in a way. And hey, from Triple H’s perspective, Rollins is the fearless, intelligent one who always turned the tide and made the big saves in the Evolution/Shield matches.
So we’ll wait and see. If Rollins shows up on Smackdown and takes 15 minutes to say EVOLUTION IS THE BETTER TEAM, THE SHIELD SUCKS, I’ll flip flop so hard I’ll break an ankle.
Best: Top 10 Comments Of The Week, Shield Breakup Edition
I don’t know why those medical personnel rushed to the ring. There’s nothing they can do for two broken hearts.
Seth while holding a chair: “triple H sends his regard”
Dean: “But he he’s standing right there, he can’t say it himself?”
Seth: “yes, but I want you to know that he sends his regards!”
Dean: “He’s literally ten feet away. We can make eye contact from here!”
Trips: “Just hit him already!”
Seth: “No! He needs to understand that this was a setu!p”
Trips: “I think he knows already”
Dean: “Yeah its pretty obvious now”
Seth: “whatever!” *hits him
Orton: “How can we trust a guy wearing pants?”
At least Evolution now has a 3rd member who can be counted on to wear black and match.
Does this mean that Batista will join the Shield?
“Jesus guys…*pant*…do we have to…*puff*…always go through…*wheeze*…the crowd? *barf*”
His name really gave it all way.
Seth. God of the desert, storms, disorder, and violence. Lord of the Red (Hunter Hearst Hemsley Fox Hunting Coat) to balance the Lord of the Black (Shield Vests). The usurper who killed his own brother for power.
Backstage Shield Pep Talk
Roman: Alright I’m going up against Orton so… Hey, where’s Seth?
Ambrose: I haven’t seen him for like *yawn* 20 minutes..
*Seth walks in*
Seth: Oh hey guys, I was just.. Getting a new vest made..
Ambrose: Is that a new watch?
Seth: No.. Yes, It was a gift..from.. my…friend..anyways.. What’s our exact plan for tonight, step by step..?
Friggin’ architects. Just can’t trust ‘em.
In this scenario, Seth Rollins is Ryan McDonagh and Reigns/Ambrose are the Montreal Canadiens.
Ric Flair is Scott Gomez.
I hope Rollins’ explanation is that “HHH told me he’d have me fued with Cena if I didn’t. Sorry guys.”
Brandon must have been further away from an airplane than he’s ever been in his life tonight.
Sorry, everybody. See you next week.
Gonna go lie down and stare off into the distance now.