You know those pictures of Jerry Jones that surfaced last week? The ones with a lady’s face pressed against his crotch. The ones with his hands grabbing those lady’s boobies? Yeah, those. Well, according to Jerry Jones he was misrepresented. I’m not sure what that means but it sure sounds like a #firstworldproblem.
“Someone has misrepresented photos taken at a restaurant five years ago for their own purposes, and so I’m just not going to comment,” Jones said Sunday.
On Saturday, Jones went to great lengths to avoid the media, arriving on the field for practice from a back gate closer to where the fans park. After practice he walked off the field with coach Jason Garrett and signed a few autographs before departing through the training room to an awaiting SUV that took him back to his hotel room.
Jones, who coughed several times as he spoke Sunday, said the reason he avoided the media was because he was not feeling well, which drew laughs and a sly smile.
I have no idea where the story goes from here. Are there more photos? Is there another manifesto? I’m fine with anything else, provided I don’t have to see that one pic of Jerry Jones and that stripper on the toilet. Because that haunted me. That gave me nightmares. So crazy people of the internet, please, more boobs and more Jerry Jones in compromising positions and less creepy bathroom Jerry.