Do You Want A Job With The Chicago Cubs?

Just imagine the perks of getting a job within the front office of the Chicago Cubs. I’m sure there would be free tickets involved. And based on your personality, I’m also sure the players would invite you out after games in Wrigleyville to hang out with them. And of course since you’re a tremendous athlete but just never got a chance to prove it, there would be days when they ask you to suit up and play. But beyond that, just the prestige of being an assistant in Research and Development is what little kid’s dreams are made of. Well today you’re in luck because Theo and Company are looking for people like you!!!

“That’s great,” said a random Cubs fan. “I would love to get a job working for my favorite baseball team. What would I be doing?”

“Glad you asked,” said the online job listing. “Basically what we’re looking for is someone to focus on the development and implementation of advanced statistical methods for player evaluation and projection in Baseball Operations.”

“Hmm. You lost me a bit there,” said the fan. “But please do go on.”

“Your responsibilities would include creating and maintaining datasets, researching, applying and evaluating statistical methods, and developing automated processes to integrate new models into the existing baseball information system framework.”

“The who and the what now?”

“I’m sorry. Don’t let those fancy words discourage you. The job is fun and exciting. You have experience with statistical software such as Stata or Python, right?”

“No.”

Postgres?”

“Don’t think so.”

“ETL techniques?”

“Not off the top of my head. I’m sure I’d know it if I saw it.”

“Bayesian modeling?”

“Bayesian? That doesn’t sound familiar. Is Bar Rafaeli Bayesian?”

“This may not be for you.”

“Or anybody.”

“Touche’.”

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