With each new year, social media urges celebrities, nobodies, and everyone in between to unleash their inner Nostradamus. Former MLB player and Twitter darling Jose Canseco is no different. He decided to share his predictions with the world on Thursday night.
Cansecodamus 2015 .It will be a great year. wait for it
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
I can’t wait, Jose. What do we mere mortals have to look forward to in 2015?
1. Life will be discovered on Mars
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
2. @JebYork chokes on silver spoon, Lott new owner, hires Jimbo, 49ers win super bowl.
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
3. Ford Model @JosieCanseco is on cover of Vogue
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
4. @BarackObama wins lead role in new NBC sitcom Old Urkel
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
5. Peace in middle east. Israel accepts trade of 200 miles of Ocean for West Bank Palestine nation. Jerusalem new UN city state
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
6. Elon Musk brings the McFly Hoverboard to market
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
8. First live interview of extra terrestrial on TV. Barbara Walters does it
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
9. New Telomere extension surgery centers open for anti and reverse ageing
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
10. Bud Selig accidentally shoots his finger off
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 2, 2015
Canseco either missed #7 or second-guessed his award-winning joke and deleted the tweet. Either way, the remaining nine are, erm, interesting. These prophesies are as wonderful as they are terrible, and I only hope each gets a 50/50 shot at becoming a reality.
The only one I disagree with is the note regarding Obama’s future in televised situational comedies. The genre is right, but the title is off. Instead, I think our nation’s president is better suited for the sequel to The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.
Source: Twitter
