After becoming the first British man to win a Grand Slam
breakfast title in 76 years, Andy Murray is just about the hottest name in all of sports right now. In fact, after he defeated Novak Djokovic to win the 2012 U.S. Open, Murray should be neck deep in British WAG cleavage for his incredible feat, but it turns out that he’s had a girlfriend for a pretty long time, and he’s doing pretty well for himself.
But now comes the fun part for Murray, as he gets to do the whole media tour and be adored by everyone across Europe, and especially his home country of Scotland. Hell, Murray could probably demand that Sean Connery un-retire from acting to finally make us that League of Extraordinary Gentlemen sequel that we’ve all been begging for, and he’d have to because Murray is the most powerful man in the United Kingdom right now.
He’s also pretty popular in the U.S. because our men’s tennis players suck and we steal everything great from the U.K. so I’m going to go ahead and say that Murray is American. With that, American tennis champion Andy Murray stopped by Late Night with Jimmy Fallon the other night, and he was serenaded with his own awesome victory song by The Roots.
I like to imagine that Murray went back to his hotel with his very attractive girlfriend and he was like, “Now I really want to watch The Proclaimers play”, so he called Queen Elizabeth and was all, “Wake up, you worthless freeloader and get me Charlie and Craig on Oy Force One, and they better be singing ‘I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles)’ within the next two hours or I’m defecting to Australia, where most people thought I was from anyway.” And two hours later…