The UConn women’s record-setting 90 game consecutive win steak is over after losing to 8th ranked Stanford 71-59 last night. And thank God they did, I was getting sick of all their Sports Center coverage and the ensuing feminist rhetoric. We gave you the right to vote, ladies, so on behalf of all American males, I respectfully ask that you spend less time on basketball, and more time on the intricate art of sandwich-making. Your priorities are all wrong.
There are about 500 reasons why this loss is so fantastic, but certainly my favorite is that Geno Auriemma lost. Considering that the man hadn’t lost any of the last 90 games he coached, us haters of all things UConn will have to cherish this milestone in bad things happening to infuriating people.
The only downside of this loss is that ESPN will try and make us care about women’s basketball all day. And although I’d love to say that I don’t care about women’s basketball, I can’t, because that wouldn’t adequately describe my level of apathy. On a scale of 1 to anything written by Peter King it’s about equal to Seltzer-Freidberg movies, Twilight, or Basketball Wives.