Meet Sporting Kansas City’s Jimmy Nielsen. He’s lying on the ground because a soccer ball touched him. In soccer. The sport where he’s a goalkeeper. The guy who stands in front of soccer balls and lets them hit him.
Juninho of the New York Red Bulls decided for whatever reason to kick a dead ball at Nielsen. It hit Jimmy in the chest, so of course he went totally limp, collapsed to the ground and pretended it hit him in the face. Maybe stopping a soccer ball is a “nails on a chalkboard” thing, or smelling your own farts. When you’re in control of it, it’s fine. When somebody else does it, it’s the end of the world, and all you can do is lie motionless until everyone involved has been removed.
Soccer, everybody. Video is after the jump.
I feel like Juninho could’ve gotten a red card just for being an asshole, you know? The illusion of permanent injury wasn’t necessary. We should start giving out awards for the least reasonable flops and embellishes, just to see which players would take it seriously and raise the bar on the game. I want to convince Blake Griffin to flop on his own dunk. Just soar through the air, 360 tomahawk it in and then collapse to the ground because the rim hurt him. If you want to stick with soccer, you could … wait, no, I think a goalkeeper collapsing because somebody kicked a ball at him is about as bad as you can get. So, uh, well done, I guess.
[h/t to Dirty Tackle]