Mario Williams Is The Richest Man In Buffalo

Mario Williams, the first overall selection by the Houston Texans in the 2006 NFL Draft, and one of the more prominent free agents this offseason, has agreed to a contract with the Buffalo Bills. The deal is the largest ever for a defensive player, and my sources in Buffalo have confirmed to me that “now he totally has money leaking out his butt and stuff.” From ESPN:

Mario Williams on Thursday agreed to a six-year deal with the Buffalo Bills that’s potentially worth $100 million and includes $50 million guaranteed, a league source told ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter.

It’s the richest deal for a defensive player in NFL history.

The Bills have called a 1:30 p.m. ET news conference to introduce the newest member of their defense, who joins a fearsome defensive line that also includes 2011 first-round pick Marcell Dareus and Pro Bowler Kyle Williams.

How much extra do you think Buffalo had to pay him to play there as opposed to, say, Miami? Probably a lot. Nothing personal against the citizens of western New York (luv ur wings, bros), but, I mean, if I were a 27-year-old millionaire, I would take way, WAY less to play somewhere a little more aesthetically pleasing. Maybe he felt he couldn’t turn down the extra cash, or maybe he thinks this provides him the best chance to win a championship over the next few years, but I assure you, if I were Mario Williams, I would have sent my agent a list of questions including: 1) Can I go to Miami? 2) Does Hawaii have a team? 3) If not, can we start a team there? 4) Not Buffalo. 5) I want to buy a helicopter.

I would be a terrible free agent.

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