Earlier this week, we reported that former UFC fighter “Jason Mayhem” Miller had been arrested on a domestic violence charge. It was the latest in a string of concerning Mayhem Miller occurrences, including that time when he “falsely imprisoned” his sister by putting her in a headlock. It was all very unfortunate.
This morning, Mayhem Miller issued an apology statement on his blog which cleared up the incident, and helped fans and reporters alike see that everybody makes mistakes, and that his brain is totally fine and not in serious, serious need of help.
“Mayhem Miller apologized on his blog” is the only true thing in that sentence. Here goes:
To Who it Concerns:
I and I beg for forgiveness. If I have brought shame or pain upon Anna, her Father, her Mother, her Sister, her children and Shiloh. Know this; JAH THE ALMIGHTY SHALL JUDGE AND NO-MAN.
I LOVE YOU.
I APOLOGIZE WITH ALL MY HEART, DURING THE MOST CHALLENGING TIME OF MY life, I ask only for YOU TO UNNASTAN. 33.
Samakatuwid magsisi at palayasin sa gayon na ang iyong mga kasalanan ay maaaring wiped-out Mga Gawa 03:19
-J. Mayhem Lion
I think he asked forgiveness from Larry Bird during part of that. I think I speak for everyone when I say, “Rastafarian apologies with random capitalizations are all we need to forgive you for beating your girlfriend, Mayhem Miller.” Right? We’re all saying that.
[h/t to Jessica]