Yesterday, Yahoo Sports "broke" the "news" that Michael Vick will soon be suspended from playing in the NFL for at least a year by der Kommissar Roger Goodell.
Umm… is it just me, or is the standard for breaking a news story unfathomably fucking low? Pacman Jones got a year suspension for being involved in stuff that he'll never get convicted for. Chris Henry got 8 games for some DUIs or something. Michael Vick got a federal indictment for running a dogfighting ring. I'm not a lawyer, but I once had sex with a chick in law school, and she said that animal cruelty for sport and gambling is worse than getting pulled over for DUI. And she had a big rack, so I believe her.
Anyway, Yahoo Sports and the rest of the sports media better watch out, because I have news that will fucking BLOW YOUR MIND: the Super Bowl will be played in February, and millions of people are going to watch it. Seriously: millions. You heard it here first.