Morning Links Look So Much Cuter With Something In Their Mouth

Gross song lyric, Chad.

Links

Nickelback Feels Your Hate And Is Desperately Trying To Win You Over, Internet – “Not making any more music” and “giving me lots of money” are the only two ways I’m going to back Nickelback. [UPROXX]

Grantland Network Podcast: The Masked Man on WWE Survivor Series – David Shoemaker gets a big leagues wrestling podcast, and I’m lucky enough to appear on the first ever episode. Does this mean I’m friends with Bill Simmons by proxy? [Grantland]

The Best And Worst Of WWE Raw 11/21 – Hey, go read this and comment on it if you haven’t already. It was good this week. Also, that picture of AJ = holy crap. [With Leather]

The NBA Lockout Is Hurting Prostitution – A joke about LeBron James going to the Miami Heat. Also, less a horrible statement about black people and more a horrible statement about rich people. [Smoking Section]

Errol Morris’s JFK Assassination Short: The Umbrella Man – Gates of Heaven is one of my very favorite movies of all time, so I’ll watch anything Errol Morris does, even if it’s about the goddamn Kennedy assassination again. [Film Drunk]

Want Some Amazing Spider-Man Set Photos? – Sure. Are these the ones where Bryce Dallas Howard is suddenly Gwen Stacy again? [Gamma Squad]

Gordon Ramsay’s Sex Advice – Sex advice from the only person in the world I’d like to have sex with less than Guy Fieri. [Warming Glow]

15 Songs You Always Knew, But Never Knew The Names Of – This is a really fun list, but some are too easy. Like I’m not going to know something that was from 2001 AND was Ric Flair’s entrance theme. Also, “Powerhouse” by Raymond Scott (aka “cartoon assembly line music”) needs to be on the list. [Buzzfeed]

And Now, Some Thanksgiving Stuff

The Shocking Truth About Thanksgiving – Like a Dave Barry column written by the Internet. [Adult Swim]

8 Wacky Presidential Turkey Pardon Moments – If I were President, all I’d do is pardon turkeys. We’d go to war and I couldn’t participate because I’m busy printing out all this bullsh*t paperwork about holiday joshing. [The FW]

What Is The Greatest Thanksgiving Movie Of All Time? – My kneejerk response was “Planes, Trains and Automobiles?” and thank God I was right. Great holiday movies should also be great every-other-day movies. [FARK]

Top 10 Reasons Why Thanksgiving Eve Is the Best Bar Night of the Year – I’m sad I didn’t completely Tucker Max my life and get into bar culture, I feel like I’m missing out on a whole avenue of writer sadness. [BroBible]

Thanksgiving Food Pyramid – My personal Thanksgiving food pyramid goes “canned cranberry sauce, Tofurky roast, that one brand of vegan macaroni and cheese that doesn’t taste like somebody barfed on a plastic tray”. [High Definite]

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