Morning Links: Steve Carlton is Getting Too Old For This Sh**

Today I start trying to convince you to read about baseball cards. Look at poor Steve Carlton up there. It’s like he’s saying “come on, I’m only 43, don’t make me pitch for the 1987 Cleveland Indians! They have wood paneling!” They finished 40 games under .500 that year and finished 7th in the AL East, back when the division had six teams. Steve Carlton won the World Series, twice! All Cory Snyder ever won was that skills competition where you stand in the outfield and try to throw the ball at a big target.

I think ’87 Topps (and Topps Traded) baseball cards are more important to me than family photos. I mean, I can’t name more than 1% of my second cousins, but I can tell you everything Greg Swindell was doing in his picture (wearing a jacket, smirking).

Sports

Number 5 Type Collection – It’s pretty easy to get obsessed with baseball card blogs, especially when they deal from the entirety of the game before your birth. As much as I love sports history, most pre-1980s baseball records are just numbers or Roberto Clemente running around with Santana playing in the background. [Number 5 Type Collection]

1 in 12 Baseball and Football Fans Are Drunk When Leaving Games – If you’ve ever driven around in a parking lot after a game, you know this is true. Also, if you’ve ever stood up and turned around during a game, or gone to the bathroom during a game and looked in the mirror. TRIBE TIME WOOOOOOOOO [BroBible]

Tom Brady Was Asking For A Meme – I’m going to keep linking this until you forget that we created it, then start sending it to us as a tip. “hey guys, check out this cool Tom Brady thing, I think I found it on Something Awful,” and then I’ll point out how it can’t be from Something Awful, because Tom Brady is never seen charging his laser. [With Leather]

Professional Wrestling’s Lamest Ring Attire – This is a pretty good list, but the guy (like most people who like wrestling on the Internet) missed out on a wonderful world of options by only watching the WWF. Arachnaman, Lingerie Mutoh and GRONDA~ are only the tip of the iceberg. [UGO]

Not Sports

100 Images That Should Be Stored In A Time Capsule For Future Generations – My contribution to the time capsule is going to be that naked TwitPic of Hayley from Paramore and that one picture of Blue Demon wearing a suit in front of a swimming pool. Also, a wistful VHS tape that looks back at all my favorite high school adventures. [Uproxx]

A Real Detective Plays L.A. Noire – Now do “a real cowboy plays Red Dead Redemption.” I’d love to see the f**king Marlboro Man standing there going “okay do I push b to jump, does b jump” and looking around desperately for a B. [G4TV]

YouTube Celebrity Sucked Out Of Vehicle In Joplin Tornado – Thousands dead in Chocolate Rainstorm. I don’t know how God could exist when he kills smiling teenagers but lets Ray William Johnson go on living. [Buzzfeed]

Take A Good Look At The New Design Of UPROXX Media – Hopefully you’ll be looking at the New Design of With Leather Media soon. I want to change the whole thing until it looks like you’re on an iPhone 24/7. It’s like the big puzzle cube thing from God of War, with me in the middle all chained up, and you have to kill minotaurs and hit switches to access our 5K Bikini Gallery. [Uproxx]

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