If you’re the kind of person who thinks that President Barack Obama didn’t get nearly enough heat for his participation in the recent Funny or Die sketch for Between Two Ferns, you’re in luck today. As he has done for the last six years, Obama released his NCAA Tournament bracket picks today, and no matter how much people complain about it, we can assume he’ll do it next year, too, and maybe for the rest of his dictatorship, depending on how far down the rabbit hole you are. Hey, I’m not knocking you conspiracy theorists and Illuminati opponents out there. You’re my favorites.
So which team’s fans should be praising the Commander-in-Chief today? The Michigan State Spartans. Like some of ESPN’s so-called college basketball experts, Obama has selected the Big Ten Champions to win the NCAA Tournament, but before you start flipping cars in East Lansing, you should probably remember that Obama has only picked the correct National Champion team one time in six years. So that’s probably actually pretty great news for Louisville, as he predicted the Cardinals to lose last year as well.
As for why he picked the Spartans, Obama lays it all on his faith in Coach Tom “To The” Izzo.
“Tom Izzo is a great tournament coach,” Obama said. “I’ve got Michigan State going all the way. … He know how to motivate folks and he knows how to coach. My pick: Michigan State. Bring it home for me. It’s been a while since I’ve won my pool.”
Besides the fourth-seeded Spartans and Cardinals, President Obama also selected No. 1 overall seed Florida and top seed Arizona to reach the Final Four in Arlington, Texas.
“I know these are not imaginative picks, but I think they’re the right ones,” Obama said of his Final Four picks. (Via ESPN)
The only thing that really strikes me as odd and potentially telling about Obama’s bracket is that he didn’t fill in a score prediction for the tiebreaker. Is that because he thinks there will be a tie? Does he think that all teams should tie because all teams should be equal and all players should have the same skill and not be better than the next guy? OH MY GOD BARACK OBAMA IS A COMMUNIST ILLUMINATI LIZARD GOD