Ron Artest Has Finally Found His True Calling: DODGEBALL!

07.26.10 7 years ago 3 Comments

Ron Artest has been filming for his new reality show all summer, and the latest place it’s taken him to is the mean streets of the Melrose A-mazing Dodgeball league as he attempted to legally pulverize some skulls with a fleet of tiny gator balls as a part of the mighty ‘Team Zankou Chicken’ squad.

Unfortunately, Artest’s basketballing skills did not transfer over as most of his throwing attempts thudded harmlessly to the wooden floors as he displayed Rick Ankiel-like control problems. Expected to be a dodgeball ‘ultimate weapon’, Artest showed off an ineffectual mindset that lacked the slaying instinct needed for successful dodgeballing and a gentle skillset better suited for the fields of croquet or your local bridge club. In fact, he proved as effective as a tiny asian women, one of which he actually used as a shield for a portion of the match. At least he did a halfway decent job of making everybody awkwardly jump up and down before the battle.

If I were the other team, I wouldn’t be afraid to try and hit Artest, I just wouldn’t want to be the one to tell him he’s out. He’d be just like one of those kids in gym who everybody knows is getting hit but the whole class is too scared of the repercussions for calling him out on it. GOOD LUCK PUMPING MY GAS NOW, JERKOFF! Videos after the jump.

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