03.28.07 11 years ago 5 Comments

Guinness has recognized some British dude named Robert Garside as the first person ever to run around the world. It's a big deal for Garside, who finished the run years ago but has been hampered by claims that he's — what's the phrase I'm looking for? — full of shit. Sports Illustrated had a great piece on him a few years back. Some highlights:

British photo agent Mike Soulsby, Garside's principal patron (to the tune of more than $10,000) since '97, [said] "I had thought Robert was credible but now realize I have been totally and utterly conned. He's a miserable little two-faced shyster."…

[Candian journalist David] Blaikie detailed inconsistencies in Garside's own Internet accounts and questioned how a man with little ultrarunning background and no logistical support could run what amounted to nearly a marathon a day for not just days and days but years and years…

In retaliation Garside made abusive phone calls to Blaikie's home, including 26 in a single evening in early 2001. "I have the moral right to call up this cold, cognitive bastard a million times and keep him up all night and ruin his life," Garside says. "He's ruined mine."

Yikes. The good news is that Garside met his future wife while running through Venezuela. That's pretty much the only reason to run around the world. In fact if I ran around the world I'd use that in my press conferences. "Why are you running around the world?" "I don't think of it as running around the world; I think of it as chasing foreign chicks. Oh yeah!" Then I'd make a humping motion so they knew I was serious.

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