09.03.09 8 years ago 2 Comments

Look, podcasts are still too tech-intensive to be considered out of Dork Domain yet. Any given podcast will never be mainstream, because you have to go off the damn stream to find it. I would know, as I host such an on-and-off piece of media that you could find on your own. But podcasts basically lo-fi radio on the internet–and that’s fine–but let’s not pretend that these things are shaping culture or society in any way. Which brings me to Adam Corolla.

Corolla’s podcast, which was spawned after his nationwide radio talk show was canceled, might be Numero Uno on the internet, iTunes, and anywhere else. So you can imagine his surprise when he was told that ESPN would not allow its staple web writer, Bill Simmons, to make an appearance on Corolla’s show.

CAROLLA: Let me just say a little something to the retards who call themselves bosses over there, because we live in a f`cking time where everyone does that, “good call, good call, good call.” You’re running a f`cking business. This is one of the most popular podcasts on the Internet. Your two clients — Bill Simmons does a podcast, popular, probably not as a popular as this podcast but very popular, and Dave Dameshek does a podcast as well, not nearly as popular as Bill Simmons’, but he still does a podcast. Now, you guys generate income via those podcasts. We share the same audience, essentially. White guys who don’t have delicate sensibilities who are in their 30s and like to play fantasy football.

TERESA: There’s no white guy in his 30s who does not read Bill Simmons.

STOP. I don’t know who “Teresa” is, but there are PLENTY of people that either don’t care about Simmons or have given up on his Boston-centric sports ramblings. Because Simmons, whose writing DID admittedly pave the way for other media outlets like this one, has shut himself off from the outside world. Some people still read him all the time. Great. But he is not this all-encompassing figure in sportswriting. Dude peaked. Bill Simmons is too busy being Bill Simmons now, and while that’s not a bad place to be, Teresa Strasser, Carolla, and their circle o’friends need to wake up and realize that, yeah, we don’t really care.

Turns out Simmons wasn’t banned from the show after all. Either way, Craggs transcribed the Corolla rant in full, which is worth reading for the “retard chicken p`ssy coward” alone. That’s amazing, really, because that’s exactly what I had planned for dinner tonight. Maybe the podcasts are catching on…

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