Thank God the Red Sox Are Out of Playoff Contention

09.18.06 11 years ago

The Red Sox swept a doubleheader against the Yankees for the first time in like 30 years. Nice work, Sox. About a month late on that competitiveness thing, though. Yankees fans are going to be bringing up that five-game sweep for the next decade or so.

Future losing MVP candidate David Ortiz hit his 49th home run in the first game, and future winning MVP candidate Derek Jeter's 25-game hitting streak ended in the second game. Big fucking deal. Ryan Howard has 57 HRs. Chase Utley and Jimmy Rollins are quietly scoffing at Jeter's pussy streak. Seriously, how are the Phillies only five games over .500?

Did you see that? I tried to think about Red Sox-Yankees, and my brain was like, "Fuck you, pal." I don't even care about the Phillies. Or the National League. Or baseball once football season starts.

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