The Best and Worst of WWE Raw 4/4

By: 04.05.11  •  18 Comments

The Best and Worst of Raw 4/4/11 offers up the best (meaning the highest quality to be found in a given activity or category of things) and worst (most faulty, unsatisfactory, or objectionable) of the April 4 edition of WWE Raw. Brandon Stroud is a syndicated advice columnist whose weekly column, The Best and Worst of Raw 4/4/11, is featured in over 250 newspapers nationwide.

A few notes as to why this column is featured on a sports comedy blog:

– The illusion of professional wrestling as a TV program is that it is presented as a loosely organized sport, classifying itself as “sports entertainment.” That makes it about as legitimate as professional boxing, baseball before the 1960s and that one Super Bowl where Kurt Warner totally fumbled on purpose.

– That being said, it is fun to write and talk about. Pretending it is real even when you know it isn’t is pro wrestling’s only bearable form. It’s not ignorance, it’s suspension of disbelief. Some people can do it and move the hell on with their lives, some can’t.

– Wrestling posts get 30 comments and lots of traffic and nobody but me and Buster Olney care about baseball.

Now, on to the fake fighting. Please stay tuned for several high-definition images of men in their underwear.

[images -> MGFanJay @ DVDR]

Best: Sin F’n Cara

Wrestling needs to be fun again. Somewhere between Samoa Joe’s descent into fat nothingness and a bunch of bloodless cage matches, televised wrestling stopped being fun. It became an ordeal, something to sit through, full of hairless, muscly guys with bad tribal tattoos with names like Chasyn Dance. There is a huge list of things that can turn pro graps on a dime and make it the funnest thing ever, and one of them is CRAZY IMPROMPTU LUCHA MADNESS.

That’s what we got in the debut of Sin Cara last night, the unbeatable combination of Mexico’s biggest draw, a trampoline, and Enigma’s “Sadness, Part 1.” Cara made his first appearance to stop (that damn bully~) Sheamus from assaulting Daniel Bryan after a United States Championship defense. He ran to the ring, hopped in over the top rope, hit a few exciting moves and topped it off with what the Spanish announcers called a SUPER PLANCHAAAA. Kids ran to the merchandise table and bought everything with Sin Cara’s name on it in size extra small. Sheamus got an exciting new opponent, Daniel Bryan got the best EWR fantasy tag team partner ever and I got a debuting superstar who is guaranteed to never use the phrases “you people” or “each and every one of you.” Because he doesn’t speak English. Score.

Around The Web

Featured

From Showman To Shaman: How An Assassination Attempt Changed Bob Marley’s Life And Music

From Zero To Guitar Hero, Meet The Small-Town Musician Who’s Well On His Way

Hannibal Buress On ‘Comedy Camisado,’ Animation, And Doing Stand-Up In Japan

Phil Matarese And Mike Luciano Talk ‘Animals.’ And Creating Television In Their Apartment

‘Black Sheep’ Revisited: The Farley-Spade Classic That Could’ve Been, 20 Years Later

EAT THIS CITY: Chef Callie Speer Shares Her ‘Can’t Miss’ Food Experiences In Austin, Texas

Kimbo Slice Is Down To Fight Kurt Angle And Roy Jones, Jr. As Soon As He Settles His Business At Bellator 149

By:  •  2 Comments

A Top Recruit Michigan Landed On Signing Day Isn’t Who You Think He Is At All

Henry Louis Gates, Jr. On How His Personal Ancestry Obsessions Led To ‘Finding Your Roots’

Love Books? Plan A Trip To The Most Literary City In The Country

What The Shot-For-Shot Remake Of The ‘Magnum P.I.’ Intro Tells Us About ‘Archer’ Season 7

By:  •  2 Comments

‘The Most Badass Event’: Experiencing A Truck Race On A Ski Mountain, Which Is As Crazy As It Sounds