The Best & Worst Moments From The Season 4 Premiere Of ‘Eastbound & Down’

While everyone was talking about the finale of that one show with the guy who did bad things but may have been a good guy at heart or whatever – like anyone even remembers that show anymore – a lot of us were also getting ready for the return of TV’s greatest, most foul-mouthed antihero, Kenny Powers. HBO’s hit comedy Eastbound & Down returned for its fourth (and probably final) season last night, and it’s safe to say that Kenny is a changed, broken man and a bitter, self-loathing hollow shell of his former self.

Picking up three years after he walked off the mound in his return to the big leagues and ultimately faked his death, Kenny is living the suburban life with his wife April and their two kids in a large home that they can barely afford on his salary as the assistant manager of a car rental company. But while Kenny has mostly changed to his family and friends, we get to see that he’s still the same maniacal party animal on the inside, and he’s just itching to break free.

Chapter 22 wasn’t the most hilarious episode of Eastbound & Down, nor was it very funny in general. In fact, it was sort of depressing until the very end, as Kenny realized that he wasn’t a star anymore and began feeling the urge to take back what he believes is his – fame, fortune and f*cking everything in between.

So What Happened After “Death”?

I’ll be honest, I was a little sour with the quick recap of the past few years between Kenny faking his own death and celebrating The Human Centipede with his daughter, because I would have liked to have seen some of those highlights played out. Hell, at least give us an episode of the funeral and/or several episodes in prison. I feel like we were robbed of this show’s best humor by not expanding on those plot points. (Especially the whole fraud angle, since faking your own death is sort of frowned upon in legal circles.)

Kenny Has Three Kids Now?

It’s safe to say that when Kenny greeted a mourning April to let her know that he had faked his own death so they could live the simple life together, they had unprotected sex and produced their young daughter. And I say three kids because we already know that Lindsay Lohan is showing up at some point this season as Kenny’s estranged daughter. How they’ll explain that Kenny has a 27-year old daughter who looks 45 is beyond me. But I already feel bad for Toby with the way Kenny talks about him. I would have made Toby a little faux-hawked douche toddler or at least given him the same hair as his father. Toby should be kicking ass at school and wreaking havoc on his teachers, not struggling to eat his carrots.

Mark Is The Absolute Worst

If the end of Chapter 22 marks the last that we’ll ever see of Mark the car rental company manager, then this season is already a success. This show’s writers have the amazing ability of developing some awesome and horrible characters all at the same time. There have been plenty of both, but in the annals of purely awful, “I want to crack this guy’s nose with a rubber mallet” characters, Mark may take the cake. That’s why this ending was so damned satisfying.

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And Then There’s The Mustang Guy

I knew as soon as this juiced up tattoo freak showed up that Kenny would get his number in the end, and I couldn’t have been happier with the result. Again, this was a really depressing episode for 20+ minutes until Kenny finally had a few sex on the beaches and let loose with Guy Young and the Sports Sesh crew. But for the phoenix to be reborn, it was going to be obviously necessary for Kenny to come back with authority and f*ck someone up. In chapter 22, we got to watch him do it to two people and they were both wonderfully insufferable and incredibly realistic.

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Is There A Place For Kenny Powers On TV?

Kenny’s former teammate, Guy Young, is the macho talking head type with an ego the size of his ratings, which sounds like the perfect scenario for Kenny to get involved with. It also doesn’t hurt that Guy is played by Ken Marino and I still shout, “I wanna dip my balls in it!” at least once a week. But I feel like we were teased with “The Kenny Powers Saga” screenplay, in that I could have watched an entire season of Kenny working on the movie of his own life. Then again, I can’t imagine that casual fans of the show would share my movie-loving zest for such a meta season-long concept, so as usual I’ll have to trust the writers on this one.

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What’s Up With The Tackle Box?

Are those drugs old? Have they been sitting in there for a long time or does he keep replenishing his drug supply “just in case” he decides to unleash the old Kenny on everyone?

Will Kenny Be Able To Return To Fame And Keep His Family In Tact?

Seven episodes left to find that out. Let’s hope that he and April can stay on the same page. You know, if Kenny can stop offending all of their friends.

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