This week, This Week In Horrible-Looking People returns to dive into the horrible, wonderful world that is green screen WWE developmental promo photos.
If you’re a regular reader of the site, you may know that WWE developmental promotions and wrestlers are basically my favorite thing. I lovingly recap WWE NXT every week and get called a “wrestling hipster” on image macro boards across the world for preferring guys like Fandango and Bray Wyatt to Chris Jericho and The Rock. Part of my love from them comes from having seen them come up in NXT, or even back in the long, long ago in Florida Championship Wrestling.
So I’ve put together a gallery of the worst, best photos of WWE developmental guys, be it from NXT or FCW, and I hope you enjoy it. If you aren’t already having seizures thanks to shirtless Bo Dallas on a motorcycle, please click through to enjoy 29 more of my favorites.
Richie Steamboat’s such a nice guy! Look at him lovingly cradle this dog!
WWE Developmental’s slogan should just be NOBODY HERE’S AS GOOD AS THEIR DAD.
And now the king of all FCW photos, “Bo Dallas takes a shit.”
Bray Wyatt in his original gimmick: Dan from ‘Roseanne.’
CJ Parker: “Hey hot mama! I’ll be back to pick you up in developmental forever!”
(Yes, WWE named a developmental guy after Pamela Anderson’s character from ‘Baywatch.’)
Reminder: Austin Aries wasn’t good enough to qualify for Tough Enough, but the pile of goo that is BUCK DIXON once had a developmental deal.
“Hi, I’m Brett DiBiase. I’m just like Ted Jr., only smaller, in worse shape and my legs don’t work. He’s the one with the personality!”
HEY GET OUT OF HERE I’M TRYING TO CHANGE
“No, for real, her ass was THIS big.”
This is Kenny Li. He is one of at least 50 Asian guys who thought going to WWE was a good idea, despite the fact that they’ve given Godzilla music and “lol you can’t speak English” gimmicks to every other Asian dude ever. Way to think things through, Kenny Li!
The weirdest thing about going through old FCW photos is how weird and naked the guys from The Shield look.
Yes, this is the ugly motherf**ker every female wrestling fan you know wants to bone. At least at this point they’d given him a jacket.
You know, Roman Reigns’ constantly-pursed lips take on an entirely new connotation when he’s only wearing underpants. And when his name’s Leakee.
more like WORSE, am I right
suggestion for improvement: lamb mask
suggestion for improvement: clothing
Here’s Alexander Rusev, nailing the “my Aunt got me this and I have to try it on for everybody because it’s Christmas” face.
oh hello, nightmares
“Look at me, I’m in The Shield! Derp!”
Good old Corey Graves, or as I like to call him, “backup CM Punk.”
Ever wondered why Leo Kruger’s always smiling? Because when he’s not, his face looks like this.
ahhahahahaha and here’s Not Leo Kruger
Nice chest sheath, Big Poppa Pump.
his face is smiling, but his torso is frowning
WWE once employed Eddie and Vickie Guerrero’s daughter and made her dress like this, and this is like the 700th ugliest thing she wore.
I love you so much, Emma. Do they make everybody do this pose?
shit, I guess they do
do they make any of the GUYS do this pose?
Eh, close enough.
that awkward moment when you realize Fandango is the least embarrassing thing you’ll ever do