Have you been looking for a fragrance for your wife or girlfriend and thought, “If only there was a perfume that we could wear together as a tribute to our favorite F-list celebrity couple”? Great news, friends, because Los Angeles Lakers forward Lamar Odom and Japanese building crusher Khloe Kardashian have answered your prayers, as they are currently working with Lighthouse Beauty in developing a unisex fragrance. Or as Khloe calls it: “human marinade.”
Khloe is following in the hoof prints of her sister,
starf*cker Kim, who has already developed her own perfume. Khloe and the purse in which she keeps her husband’s testicles are fulfilling a lifelong dream that she shared with Kim in becoming elite names in the world of beauty and overbearing stench. Meanwhile, Lamar is fulfilling his lifelong dream of throwing his man card into a wood chipper.
He who smelt it, dealt it, NY Daily News:
The new scent may be named “Unbreakable,” Khloe Kardashian told WWD, though she added, “Baby, I dunno, we’re still working on it.”
Odom is brand ambassador for the Ultimate Tough G-Shock watch.
The moniker of the fragrance is still up in the air, a Lighthouse spokesman said, as is the aroma of the new fragrance.
Unbreakable? More like “Unbearable”! *bowtie spins, keeps spinning until stench is gone*
But seriously, if the fragrance is truly going to reflect Lamar and Khloe as people, then it will likely be named “Skittles and Burrito Farts.” Or how about “Lamar Odor and Khloe Kardassian Present Exclusion”? That way they can honor both Khloe’s outcast status among Laker wives and Lamar’s standing in the LA locker room and pretty much everywhere else.
Lamar’s foray into cosmetic fragrances puts him in exclusive company with Michael Jordan (see 1996 commercial below) and, more recently, Carmelo Anthony with his own line of TAG Body Spray, which suddenly seems exponentially less douchey.