#KATE UPTON

The Political Victory Nobody Is Talking About: Kate Upton’s Uncle Won His Election

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I don’t know anything about Michigan’s Fred Upton and his politics, but for circumstances that are important to the very fabric with which this site operates, I had to look them up.

THE ONION

Derpy Louisiana Congressman John Fleming Thinks The Onion Publishes Real News

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As anyone who pays attention can attest, the current crop of elected officials in Congress ranks among the more doltish of all-time, which is saying a lot, as this nation has sent some real retards to Washington over the years.

ted stevens

Politicians Who Don’t Understand The Internet Just Aren’t Funny Anymore

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I've ranted quite a bit here and in other places about the absurdity of having people who know absolutely nothing about the internet -- and who also don't exhibit the slightest desire to do anything to remedy their ignorance -- being the ones who make laws regulating it.

#Facebook

Congress Updates Law So Netflix Can Spam Your Facebook

You might remember Robert Bork, if you're a total nerd: every time somebody on Fox News screams about "legislating from the bench," they're quoting Bork.

#MEMES

Meme Watch: Pizza Is Apparently A Vegetable

Last week, the United States Congress passed a revised agriculture appropriations bill that basically stated that 1/8th of a cup of tomato paste could qualify as a half cup of vegetables in terms of nutritional value.

#Twitter

Weiner Packs It In

New York Representative Anthony Weiner resigned today, meaning we can finally stop making Weiner puns.

youtube covers

YouTube Song Covers Could Now Land You In Jail for 5 Years

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Oh so you want to do a cover of your favorite song and put it on YouTube, perhaps in the hopes of putting yourself on the music industry map, just like my little songbird friend Lelia Broussard did a couple of years ago with her cover of Beyonce's "Single Ladies" embedded above.

#NFL

Even Congress Hates Jay Cutler

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In last season's NFC Championship game against the Packers, Bears quarterback Jay Cutler hurt his knee (or didn't hurt his knee) and took a powder.

Spotlight

De La Soul’s Debut Becomes A National Treasure

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As residents of a renown, yet contained community, it is still vital that we protect our own and stick up for one another when outsiders breach our gates.

#Animals

All The Animal News That’s Fit To Print

Animal News The bobcat seen above climbed a 40-foot-tall cactus in Arizona to hide from a mountain lion.

Video Game

Congressmen Want Crazy Warning For Violent Video Games

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You know how politicians love to trot out hyped up "evidence" that violent games can make kids into violent savages.

#APPLE

How Much Money Has Wikipedia’s Creepy Campaign Raised?

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We've been making fun of Wikipedia's urgent pleas from founder Jimmy Wales for awhile now, but one thing is undeniable: their campaign is working.

#MLB

Roger Clemens Doesn’t Really Get It

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Since being indicted last week on charges of perjury and obstruction, among other felonies, Roger Clemens has been feverishly denying the allegations that he ever used performance-enhancing drugs and especially that he lied to Congress.

#Star Wars

JABBA THE PUTZ GOES TO WASHINGTON

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George Lucas was on Capitol Hill Tuesday, and since congress is full of dorky old white guys, he felt right at home – or at least, as right at home as is possible for a borderline autistic.


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