2014 NCAA TOURNAMENT

Who's Got NCAA Tournament Headline Jokes? Dayton Flyers Got Headline Jokes

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After the Dayton Flyers pulled off the first upset of the 2014 NCAA Tournament, the Dayton Daily News poked fun at Ohio State with its front page headline.

FUNNY HEADLINES

Best Headline? “Brian Grazer: Fatass Man-Nanny Made My Kids Racist.”

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Pic via <a href="http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/VnQNOOfHYTo/Brian+Grazer+Outside+NYC+Hotel" target="_blank">PacificCoastNews.com</a> Despite looking like a wiry speed freak who drinks hair gel and snorts embalming fluid, Brian Grazer is one of the biggest-name producers in town, and normally the type of guy who lets his movies do the talking.

ARE WE OFFICIALLY DATING

The Zac Efron Dildo Meltdown of 2013

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Here it is, your headline of the day: God bless the <a href="http://www.nypost.com/p/pagesix/zac_efron_embarrassed_by_sex_shop_Jh0xvqI5uzSPSrTPo9JZtO" target="_blank">New York Post</a>, doing the Lord's work as always.

FUNNY HEADLINES

Today in Unfortunate Headline/Picture Juxtapositions

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This is a screencap of an article that came up in my Google Reader this morning.

BABY MONKEY

Probably the best headline of all time

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[via <a href="http://boingboing.net/2012/05/15/zookeeper-reportedly-licks-bab.html" target="_blank">BoingBoing</a>] I know I've already run my fair share of "BEST HEADLINE EVER" stories, but this legitimately gave me an uncontrollable, 30 to 60-second fit of laughter.

DOG SHOWS

Headline of the Day, Ufford pets dogs, Morning Links

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Not only is this headline amazing, in the picture it looks like old sweater vest is holding a couple of dicks.

BUTTCOKE

The search for the world’s greatest headline is over

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You'll have to excuse the non-movie-related digression once again, but given the banner image, I think you understand.

DOGS WEARING COSTUMES

Morning Links, with Sex Offender Dog

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I knew Sex Offender Dog was up to no good, just because of how he was dressed.

FOOTLOOSE

Today’s NY Post cover really says it all

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As you can see, today's<a href="http://www.nypost.com/"> NY Post</a> cover is a model of serendipitous picture/headline juxtapositions.

FUNNY HEADLINES

Best Headline Ever? The Washington Post Deserves a Pulitzer (UPDATE)

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UPDATE: As FilmDrunkard Russell points out: "The paper that you have in that picture is the Express, which is a free paper that gets passed out at Washington DC Metro stations.

anthony weiner

‘Obama Beats Weiner,’ today’s actual NY Post headline.

By | 14 Comments

It seems the Weiner pun headlines have finally reached the Baba Booey stage of their life cycle, where it wasn't funny the first thousand times, but now it's finally starting to come back around to being funny again.

FUNNY HEADLINES

‘Michael Fassbender gave horses erections’

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Obviously, there isn't much to add to this story.

FUNNY HEADLINES

Scratch Harry Baals off your list

By | 18 Comments

Folks, I know I vented a little about that <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2011/02/the-most-shockingly-asinine-news-story-of-all-time" target="_blank">Variety article</a> back there, and I'm sorry if I brought you down, but now I've got something to share that makes it all worthwhile.

DRUNK JEDI

Obi-Wan was HAMMERED

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Today's awesome headline comes from <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/40447269/ns/us_news-weird_news/" target="_blank">MSNBC</a>: "Jedi master jailed for beating.

FRIDAY FREE FOR ALL

Important News Story of the Day: Johnny Rotten Farted on Jamiroquai

By | 18 Comments

The only sources for this story are the notoriously unreliable <a href="http://jam.canoe.ca/Music/2010/11/24/16290051-wenn-story.html" target="_blank">WENN</a> and the <a href="http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/bizarre/3243058/Jay-Kay-kicks-up-a-stink-about-smelly-John-Lydon.html" target="_blank">Sun</a>, but I don't care.

FRIDAY FREE FOR ALL

Lesbian Fake Doctor Jailed for Providing Free Breast Exams in Bars

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Today I've got yet another sad story about our country going down the crapper.

CORY BUCKLEY

Man in Joker Mask Tries to Steal Drugs from an Old Lady on the Toilet

By | 10 Comments

In my favorite news headline <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/11/man-forced-to-eat-his-own-beard-in-fight-over-lawnmower-friday-free" target="_blank">since</a> Kentucky's "Man forced to eat his own beard in fight over lawnmower," we can now add Akron, Ohio's "Clown robs elderly woman sitting on the toilet.

FRIDAY FREE FOR ALL

‘Man Forced to Eat His Own Beard in Fight over Lawnmower’

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Game over, world, I've found my favorite news story of all time.

FUNNY HEADLINES

'Daniel Radcliffe looks forward to sex with Broadway dancers'

By | 12 Comments

As you might have guessed, today's headline of the day is "Daniel Radcliffe looks forward to sex with Broadway dancers," and it comes from the <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/10/11/daniel-radcliffe-looks-fo_n_757821.html" target="_blank">HuffingtonPost</a>.

DAVID SCHWIMMER

Headline of the Day: Schwimmer's Serious Rape Tale

By | 27 Comments

Okay, okay, so I modified this screencap slightly from <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/Schwimmer-serious-rape-tale-original.jpg" target="_blank">the original</a>.


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