Maybe "happy" isn't the right word.
- Geek & Sci-Fi
I was talking with Nick the other night, and we determined that the most forgotten team in baseball is either the Toronto Blue Jays or the Houston Astros.
It's a tale as old as time - boy meets girl, boy courts girl, boy takes girl to Houston Astros game, boy turns hat sideways, batter hits foul ball, boy moves out of way, ball hits girl.
I've never considered baseball to be a very violent game, but there are still plenty of ways one could get injured.
If you're not a fan of baseball, this may not be for you.
Astros pitcher Brandon Backe attended a wedding at a Galveston resort over the weekend, and you know how wedding receptions are: you try to take open containers of alcohol into the pool, then <a href="http://www.wtag.com/cc-common/news/sections/sportsarticle.html?feed=104670&article=4353202" target="_blank">you punch a cop and get arrested</a>.
Amanda Beard, the champion breaststroker who maintained her dominance over three Olympic Games, is now better remembered for <a href="http://digg.com/celebrity/Amanda_Beard_nude_in_Playboy_20_Pictures" target="_blank">her Playboy spread</a>.
NL - Milwaukee <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/recap?gameId=280804117&action=playvideo&hcmp=motion" target="_blank">dropped the seventh of its last nine games</a> last night to the Reds and nerves seem to be getting frayed among the Cerveceros.
Astros pitcher Shawn Chacon has been <a href="http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/chronicle/5856597.html" target="_blank">suspended indefinitely</a> after an altercation with general manager Ed Wade turned violent.
Astros second baseman Kaz Mastui <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/spring2008/news/story?id=3294343" target="_blank">will be sidelined for two weeks</a> after he has surgery on his anal fissures.
I've barely heard of Hunter Pence before this morning, but the Astros' young outfielder will now be forever famous for having the spatial reasoning of a barn swallow: Pence <a href="http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/sports/5551817.html" target="_blank">crashed through a plate glass sliding door</a> that he thought had been left open, leaving him with lacerations all over his body.
There are a few pennant contenders (Note: Actual contention will end on or before tax day) <a href="http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08039/855811-63.stm" title="Pittsburgh Post Gazette" target="_blank">interested in former Cy Young winner Bartolo Colon</a>:The Pirates, Houston Astros and Kansas City Royals had scouts at Colon's most recent start, Wednesday in the Caribbean World Series.
<a href="http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news;_ylt=Aie2w8iLOktPC6Lqc3LkGzU5nYcB?slug=ap-pettitte-hghadmission&prov=ap&type=lgns" title="Yahoo Sports" target="_blank">Andy Pettitte admitted to using HGH</a> in a press conference yesterday:"In 2002 I was injured.
As <a href="http://deadspin.com/sports/poop/bring-your-umbrellas-to-paul-brown-stadium-on-monday-304783.php" target="_blank">Deadspin</a> noted yesterday, Cincinnati officials were looking for a way to deal with the pigeon infestation at Paul Brown Stadium, which has led to several customers dealing with pigeon shit in their food and drink.
The Chicago Cubs moved a half-game up on the Milwaukee Brewers to take the NL Central Division lead with a <a href="http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/recap?gid=270913118" title="Yahoo Sports" target="_blank">6-2 win over the Houston Astros last night</a>.
The Astros lost at home to the Nationals last night, but they still <a href="http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/sports/5070401.html" target="_blank">had a better night than one fan</a> who used the romantic backdrop of a meaningless baseball game in humid-ass Houston to propose to his date.