16-year-old on acid with “super-human strength” spits blood on cops

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This story from yesterday's <a href="" target="_blank">Marin Independent Journal</a> may not be movie-related, strictly speaking, but I'm going to go ahead and file it under "real-life X-Men.


Florida Friday: Lady Gaga’s bodyguard tazed to death after naked cocaine rampage

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I'll be honest, today's Florida Friday story is kind of dark, but aren't they all.


FLORIDA: Naked Carny Poops & Masturbates Amidst Gunfire

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Great news, our scientists have finally done it, they've discovered the most Florida story ever told.


Pictures: The Real-Life Snakes on a Plane in Australia

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Have you ever been on a plane that kept hitting freaky turbulence or been cut off by some fascist stewardess trying to enforce some never-agreed-to dress code that involves pants.


Man with Machete Fights Man with Chain in front of flaming tow truck

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This site isn't always about movie stuff that sounds like news, sometimes it's also about news stuff that sounds like movies.


Man named "Jackmeoff Mudd" arrested… guess where.

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There've been a lot of crazy news stories going around this week - a guy<a href="" target="_blank"> shot himself in the ass</a> in a theater,<a href="" target="_blank"> Jonah Hill</a> took pictures of a placenta, a prisoner<a href="" target="_blank"> lost his butt drugs</a>, a guy brought an <a href="" target="_blank">arsenal to a Dark Knight screening</a> - and amazingly, none of them happened in Florida.


Man accidentally shoots himself in the butt during Bourne Legacy

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Ever since the Aurora theater massacre, people have felt an acute need to protect themselves when they head to the theater, and that means guns.


Prisoner loses butt drugs during drunken Silence of the Lambs dance

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Troy Kenneth Campbell was having your basic drunken day in Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island, Canada, when he was arrested for "dancing in the middle of University Avenue with a beer in one hand and a cheeseburger in the other.


Methed-up gas huffer calling herself The Karate Kid tries to bite police

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A methed-up gas huffer reportedly told police that she was "The Karate Kid" before trying to bite them and getting tazed twice in South Carolina this week (you feel that breeze just now.


Dwarf actor & former Ewok gets caught exposing himself on the train. AGAIN.

By | 35 Comments

Nicholas Read, a dwarf actor who played an Ewok in Return of the Jedi and a goblin in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, recently admitted flashing his wiener at a college girl on a train, then snapping a picture of her reaction.

twilight fans

Twilight fan names her cat "Renesmee," cat rightly tries to kill her

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This morning, I posted <a href="" target="_blank">the first picture from Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2</a>, featuring Bella and Edward's telepathic, half-vampire baby, Renesmee.


Man stabs his computer with a samurai sword because it was full of child porn

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Most guys I know hide their porn simply by labeling their computer's porn folder something they know their girlfriends won't be interested in, like "Reason" or "The Ability to Drive.


Famed publicist choked to death on free beef

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Famed Hollywood publicist Michael Sands, described as "the brains behind Mr.


British gravy wrestler takes wrench to the face during sex dispute

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Take note, journalists, this is how you write a lede: Gravy-wrestling model suffers horrific facial injuries after being hit with monkey wrench when she interrupted a friend having sex.


Bulgarian dude arrested on bus with a suitcase full of crocodiles & komodo dragons

By | 20 Comments

No, this isn't movie related, at least not yet, but this is my solemn oath to you: any time a man gets arrested with a <a href="" target="_blank">suitcase full of crocodiles</a>, I will be writing about it.


Woman literally wipes ass with $30 million painting, celebrates by peeing herself

By | 46 Comments

It looks like we've already got one solid lock for the FilmDrunk Memorial Drunkard of the Year, 2012 Edition.


Man misses mouse and shoots roommate, revealing child rapist

By | 54 Comments

It was only days ago that I finished our round up of the <a href="" target="_blank">Most Insane News Stories of 2011</a>, and already we have an early lock for 2012 (if this doesn't make it, this year will see it rain frogs and a pigeon elected president).

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