REAL LIFE X MEN

16-year-old on acid with “super-human strength” spits blood on cops

By | 28 Comments

This story from yesterday's <a href="http://www.marinij.com/crimebeat/ci_24202506/three-arrested-one-injured-after-mill-valley-lsd" target="_blank">Marin Independent Journal</a> may not be movie-related, strictly speaking, but I'm going to go ahead and file it under "real-life X-Men.

#FLORIDA

Florida Friday: Lady Gaga’s bodyguard tazed to death after naked cocaine rampage

By | 41 Comments

I'll be honest, today's Florida Friday story is kind of dark, but aren't they all.

#FLORIDA

FLORIDA: Naked Carny Poops & Masturbates Amidst Gunfire

By | 59 Comments

Great news, our scientists have finally done it, they've discovered the most Florida story ever told.

THAT'S NOT A KNIFE

Pictures: The Real-Life Snakes on a Plane in Australia

By | 10 Comments

Have you ever been on a plane that kept hitting freaky turbulence or been cut off by some fascist stewardess trying to enforce some never-agreed-to dress code that involves pants.

Machete

Man with Machete Fights Man with Chain in front of flaming tow truck

By | 11 Comments

This site isn't always about movie stuff that sounds like news, sometimes it's also about news stuff that sounds like movies.

#FLORIDA

Man named "Jackmeoff Mudd" arrested… guess where.

By | 24 Comments

There've been a lot of crazy news stories going around this week - a guy<a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2012/08/man-accidentally-shoots-himself-in-the-butt-during-bourne-legacy" target="_blank"> shot himself in the ass</a> in a theater,<a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2012/08/jonah-hill-took-pictures-of-a-ladys-placenta" target="_blank"> Jonah Hill</a> took pictures of a placenta, a prisoner<a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2012/08/canadian-drunk-loses-butt-drugs-during-silence-of-the-lambs-dance" target="_blank"> lost his butt drugs</a>, a guy brought an <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2012/08/would-be-hero-arrested-for-bringing-guns-to-dark-knight-showing" target="_blank">arsenal to a Dark Knight screening</a> - and amazingly, none of them happened in Florida.

THEATERS

Man accidentally shoots himself in the butt during Bourne Legacy

By | 19 Comments

Ever since the Aurora theater massacre, people have felt an acute need to protect themselves when they head to the theater, and that means guns.

TROY KENNETH CAMPBELL

Prisoner loses butt drugs during drunken Silence of the Lambs dance

By | 15 Comments

Troy Kenneth Campbell was having your basic drunken day in Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island, Canada, when he was arrested for "dancing in the middle of University Avenue with a beer in one hand and a cheeseburger in the other.

TRACEY MCSWAIN SMITH

Methed-up gas huffer calling herself The Karate Kid tries to bite police

By | 21 Comments

A methed-up gas huffer reportedly told police that she was "The Karate Kid" before trying to bite them and getting tazed twice in South Carolina this week (you feel that breeze just now.

SEX OFFENDERS

Dwarf actor & former Ewok gets caught exposing himself on the train. AGAIN.

By | 35 Comments

Nicholas Read, a dwarf actor who played an Ewok in Return of the Jedi and a goblin in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, recently admitted flashing his wiener at a college girl on a train, then snapping a picture of her reaction.

twilight fans

Twilight fan names her cat "Renesmee," cat rightly tries to kill her

By | 38 Comments

This morning, I posted <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2012/06/twilight-breaking-dawn-2-renesmee-cullen-picture" target="_blank">the first picture from Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2</a>, featuring Bella and Edward's telepathic, half-vampire baby, Renesmee.

SWORDPLAY

Man stabs his computer with a samurai sword because it was full of child porn

By | 20 Comments

Most guys I know hide their porn simply by labeling their computer's porn folder something they know their girlfriends won't be interested in, like "Reason" or "The Ability to Drive.

MICHAEL SANDS

Famed publicist choked to death on free beef

By | 31 Comments

Famed Hollywood publicist Michael Sands, described as "the brains behind Mr.

SEX FIGHTS

British gravy wrestler takes wrench to the face during sex dispute

By | 26 Comments

Take note, journalists, this is how you write a lede: Gravy-wrestling model suffers horrific facial injuries after being hit with monkey wrench when she interrupted a friend having sex.

NOT REALLY MOVIE RELATED

Bulgarian dude arrested on bus with a suitcase full of crocodiles & komodo dragons

By | 20 Comments

No, this isn't movie related, at least not yet, but this is my solemn oath to you: any time a man gets arrested with a <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/10/crocodile-on-a-plane-kills-19" target="_blank">suitcase full of crocodiles</a>, I will be writing about it.

INSANE NEWS

Woman literally wipes ass with $30 million painting, celebrates by peeing herself

By | 46 Comments

It looks like we've already got one solid lock for the FilmDrunk Memorial Drunkard of the Year, 2012 Edition.

PAUL DANIEL KUNZLER

Man misses mouse and shoots roommate, revealing child rapist

By | 54 Comments

It was only days ago that I finished our round up of the <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2011/12/the-year-in-weird-the-10-most-insane-news-stories-of-2011" target="_blank">Most Insane News Stories of 2011</a>, and already we have an early lock for 2012 (if this doesn't make it, this year will see it rain frogs and a pigeon elected president).


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