#Reviews

‘Christian Mingle: The Movie’ Is An Unintentional Parody Of Whiteness

By | 83 Comments

This movie is so white it makes a Lands End catalog look like Jet Magazine.

MAPS TO THE STARS

Review: David Cronenberg’s ‘Maps To The Stars’ Successfully Makes Sex, Drugs, And Hollywood Boring

By | 23 Comments

David Cronenberg's latest "being rich and famous ain't all it's cracked up to be" entry.

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY

Fifty Shades Of Specialty Arclight Cocktails: A Drunk Review

By | 34 Comments

Sarah Sprague drank all the Arclight's specialty 'Fifty Shades' cocktails and then attempted to watch the movie.

KINGSMAN: THE SECRET SERVICE

Review: ‘Kingsman’ Is James Bond For People Who Like Constant, Winky References To James Bond

By | 122 Comments

'Kingsman: The Secret Service' is a movie that references Bond a lot, but never really outdoes it.

SUNDANCE REVIEWS

Review: ‘The D-Train’ Dynamites The Bromance Comedy

By | 46 Comments

One of those rare films that reminds me why I love comedy.

Seventh Son Review

Review: ‘Seventh Son’ Is Seven Times Less Fun Than A Real Movie

By | 30 Comments

Definitely makes plans to see this around the first of never ever.

TRUE STORY

Review: ‘True Story’ Is A Masturbatory Faux Morality Tale Starring Jonah Hill And James Franco

By | 19 Comments

'True Story' wants to judge its own unreliable narrator even while believing everything he says.

movie reviews

Review: ‘Jupiter Ascending’ Is Like ‘Battlefield Earth’ Without The Excuse Of Scientology

By | 149 Comments

Channing Tatum plays an albino space wolf who flies around doing parkour on floating rollerblades.

everly

Review: ‘Everly’ Might Look Like ‘Jane Wick,’ But She’s A Completely Different Killer

By | 11 Comments

In 'Everly,' Salma Hayek stars as a prostitute hunted by every killer in the Yakuza, and that's just the tip of the ridiculous iceberg.

#Reviews

Review: ‘Partisan’ Is A Meditative Thriller About A Colony Of Child Assassins

By | 26 Comments

Ariel Kleiman's 'Partisan' is an intense coming-of-age story set amongst a separatist cult of underage assassins.

#Reviews

Review: Sam Rockwell Plays A Biblical Treasure Hunter In Jared Hess’s Undercooked ‘Don Verdean’

By | 33 Comments

Sam Rockwell stars plays an archaeologist searching for a second draft of this script.

movie reviews

Review: ’71’ Is An Intense, Hyper Violent Anti-War Film About ‘The Troubles’ In Northern Ireland

By | 38 Comments

If you like your anti-war films in the form of sphincter-tightening kicks to the nuts, '71 is the film for you.

#Sundance 2015

‘Grandma’ Stars Lily Tomlin As A Cuss-Mouthed Lesbian In A Sundance Conventional Dramedy

By | 15 Comments

Lily Tomlin gives no Fs in the Sundance dramedy 'Grandma,' which seems too impressed with its own very mild outrageousness.

movie reviews

Review: ‘Mortdecai’ – Why?

By | 56 Comments

A movie about nothing, made for no one.

CAKE

Review: Jennifer Aniston Is So, So Brave In ‘Cake,’ The World’s Dullest ‘Awards Movie’

By | 116 Comments

Golden Globe, Oscar, Nobel Peace Prize - I'd write in Jennifer Aniston for president if it meant never watching a film like this again.


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