ODD INJURIES

Mariano Rivera And The New York Yankees Love To Laugh

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The New York Yankees are currently in first place in the AL East with the second-best record in all of baseball, so as soon as they have that best record in baseball status locked up – and maybe toss in a few highway robbery trades as well – all will be well in the universe, according to Yankees fans.

#UFC

Ray Elbe Talks About That Time He Bent His Penis Bent Backwards And Broke It

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<a href="http://withleather.uproxx.com/2012/12/ray-elbe-broke-his-penis/ray_elbe_hospital" rel="attachment wp-att-100396"></a>OH GOD I JUST READ MY OWN HEADLINE Ray Elbe -- you may remember him from season 9 of 'The Ultimate Fighter -- suffered an injury that no man should have to suffer.

PERCY HARVIN

Me And Adrian Peterson Are Basically The Same Guy

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And now, a post on a semi-reputable sports comedy blog about how I once at lobster at a seafood restaurant shaped like a barn and threw up everywhere.

#south park

Lawrence Vickers Had Ants In The Pants

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<a href="http://uproxx.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/lawrence-vickers.png"></a>In the best NFL/children's game story mash-up since Mario Williams accidentally Woke Daddy, veteran fullback Lawrence Vickers had to be helped off the pratice field during the Dallas Cowboys' final week of organized team activities to be medically treated for Ants In The Pants.

ODD INJURIES

Gina Carano Won’t Stop Hurting People

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"The only time I got hurt was when I punched Gina Carano in the head by accident.

OMG ZACK GREINKE

Zack Greinke Injured by Charlie Sheen??? Click Here

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He wasn't, but if you asked me to name 900 reasons why Zack Greinke would be starting his first season as a Milwaukee Brewer on the DL with a fractured rib, "attacked by Charlie Sheen" might be on there, but "grabbed a rebound in a game of street hoops" wouldn't.

SHAWNE MERRIMAN

Shawne Merriman Lasted 15 Minutes

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The newest Buffalo Bill already has come up lame.

STUPID ATHLETES

Ravens Rookie Hospitalized After Run-In With Stairs

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Ravens second-round pick Sergio Kindle may have a hard time getting the boatload of money he's striving for in the rookie contract he'll eventually sign if he continues displaying coordination that mirrors that of mine at the age of 5 (Okay, and at the age of now).


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